First things first: I Poppa freaks all the honeys:
Damn you, Griff. Now you got me doing it. Now I am sure that a lot of you are all like “WHOOO! Fourth of July! Let me celebrate the freedom of this nation by kicking the shit out of an Indian and making a nigger pick my cotton! USA! WHOOOO! SKYNARD!” and to that I say cool. If you AREN’T doing that then you are missing the reason to be proud to be an American: wanton, rampant and unapologetic douchery to those that are lesser than you. So Indians, find a Turk and smack the shit out of them for America. You earned it. US-MOTHERFUCKING-A!
Now some of you would see that statement as being unpatriotic. Well, fuck your face. The Fourth of July is just another holiday for rednecks to see reason to shoot off fireworks, get drunk of Keystone and talk about how great America is over let’s say…a train. Simpsons reference. Well, I honestly don’t give a shit about any holiday except Valentine’s Day in Japan because I like getting gifts without the bullshit of whether it is Jesus’s or Santa’s birthday and all the lame ass carols. So much like St. Patrick’s Day, Cinco De Mayo and Yom Kippur, this is another holiday to give White people a reason to do something borderline illegal and not feel like shits. Well, you know what? YOU ARE WHITE. YOU SHOULD NEVER BE SAD BECAUSE YOU HAVE THE AWESOMENESS OF BEING WHITE TO FALL BACK ON! Besides, it was Indepencence from the British we are celebrating, not whatever in the hell we celebrate now. So instead of honkeys shooting off fireworks at Wolven awful hours of the night yelling “WHOOOOO! USA!” we should do what our slave-raping forefathers INTENDED FOR US TO DO. And that is powerbomb the shit out of an Englishman:
BTW, that is Canada giving the clothsline to complete the Doomsday Device. If anyone knows about kicking the shit out of someone with a wrestling move, it’s the Canadians. If wars were held in steel cages or on ladder, you best believe Canada is who I want taging with us over England. Now THAT would reek of awesomeness:
Man, now Edge and Christian would make an awesome President and Vice-President. Could you imagine Kim Jong Il getting a Conchairto for being such a douche? I can and it would be the most awesome moment since the first time I saw the commercial for the Transformers train set.
Well, with that being said I hope you all enjoy your 4th of July. Odd how people are celebrating their independence from our current only ally aside from Poland. Can’t forget Poland:
I lol’d. Anyway, I have a new catchphrase for today….
Celebrate freedom. Powerbomb an Englishman.
Chachi Out
Saturday, July 04, 2009
Wednesday, July 01, 2009
Now I'm On That Soju Again, Oh S**t, You Know I'm Back!
I AINT DEAD, MOTHERFUCKERS! I am BACK AND I AM FILLED WITH FURY! Oh, and soon to be filled with soju. Yeah, it’s how I deal with my problems so FUCK YOU, FUCKY. Soju doesn’t judge me or lay me off because I am keeping my options open because I am about to get fired. YEAH, I SAID IT. But again, those are the breaks and I am pretty much over it. When you have good friends, it makes things like this easy to handle. Thanks to Copper and Kasey for being down for the team. When I get my superpowers and hold the world at bay with my evil intentions, you will be my Gin and Tousen. Or my Bebop and Rocksteady, depending on whether I want to go the demented ninja master route.
So I will finish up the 101 Things That Piss Me Off next week (Only thirty left so you can pretty much guess them) due to some irritations on this end. Also, I think I will do a blog this weekend about something. It was GOING to be Michael Jackson but since Black people get Niggamnesia about the King of Pop I just will let it go because I honestly haven’t thought about the dude since America’s Best Dance Crew and I am not going to act like I am broken up or shocked about it. Reports of painkillers were rampant for over 10 years or so after all that has happened to his body so if you are shocked then you don’t know their long term effects in massive doses. And before you get sand in your vaginas NO it doesn’t take away from him as an artist but it doesn’t make me feel like he is any more tragic than James Brown when he died. The man was on Ike Turner levels of beating his wife but he was still the Godfather of Soul and Hot Tub Man #1:
Too hot in the hot tub! Always funny…unlike Eddie Murphy now. Anyway, I will leave Michael Jackson alone for now and let people with short-term memory remember him how they want to. He will always be the big-nosed kid with the afro doing the robot to “Dancing Machine” and the guy that convinced me to buy a Sega Genesis and spend countless quarters on that DAMN GAME THAT I COULDN’T BEAT TO SAVE MY GOD DAMNED LIFE:
Damn, those special moves should be in every game. Could you imagine that shit in Ninja Gaiden? Might make that game beatable. Naaaah. Anyway, rest in peace Mike. You will be missed. Especially by Tito. He was THIS CLOSE to getting that hit! I will be back up soon. Oh, and for those of you wondering why I don’t post the Countdown anymore, I have it on my YouTube channel now for the most part. Check it out when you get the chance. I will be back up soon and more often. Until then, stay up peeps. AND I AM BACK, BITCHES!
Chachi Out
So I will finish up the 101 Things That Piss Me Off next week (Only thirty left so you can pretty much guess them) due to some irritations on this end. Also, I think I will do a blog this weekend about something. It was GOING to be Michael Jackson but since Black people get Niggamnesia about the King of Pop I just will let it go because I honestly haven’t thought about the dude since America’s Best Dance Crew and I am not going to act like I am broken up or shocked about it. Reports of painkillers were rampant for over 10 years or so after all that has happened to his body so if you are shocked then you don’t know their long term effects in massive doses. And before you get sand in your vaginas NO it doesn’t take away from him as an artist but it doesn’t make me feel like he is any more tragic than James Brown when he died. The man was on Ike Turner levels of beating his wife but he was still the Godfather of Soul and Hot Tub Man #1:
Too hot in the hot tub! Always funny…unlike Eddie Murphy now. Anyway, I will leave Michael Jackson alone for now and let people with short-term memory remember him how they want to. He will always be the big-nosed kid with the afro doing the robot to “Dancing Machine” and the guy that convinced me to buy a Sega Genesis and spend countless quarters on that DAMN GAME THAT I COULDN’T BEAT TO SAVE MY GOD DAMNED LIFE:
Damn, those special moves should be in every game. Could you imagine that shit in Ninja Gaiden? Might make that game beatable. Naaaah. Anyway, rest in peace Mike. You will be missed. Especially by Tito. He was THIS CLOSE to getting that hit! I will be back up soon. Oh, and for those of you wondering why I don’t post the Countdown anymore, I have it on my YouTube channel now for the most part. Check it out when you get the chance. I will be back up soon and more often. Until then, stay up peeps. AND I AM BACK, BITCHES!
Chachi Out
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Monday: Sucking Ass Since The Dawn Of Time
After about a week I am back and I am sorry for the absence. Things are bugging me but now that I know no one else gives a shit, neither do I. What can one do? Anyway, I want to finish something up…
101 Things That Piss Me Off!
We are in the 30’s right now so lets get moving!
39. SPIKE TV: So, um…since when was UFC and shitty action movies the sign of being a man? I seem to have missed the boat on this one and maybe it is because I am 70/30 gay that fluctuates damn near hourly but I have only watched one show on SPIKE and that was TNA Wrestling. And the only reason for that is that there is no America’s Best Dance Crew on. More on the “manly man” bullshit later but Spike has no redeeming qualities whatsoever. And if you say UFC…you gay, boy. Go look at some yaoi and paddle yourself YOU SICK FREAK.
38. Justin Timberlake: Well…I dunno. I mean J-Tim has been working my nerves for about a year now because he is Blacker than I am. Not a shock or a big deal but man I think people need to remember that this dude was the lead singer of N’SYNC which wasn’t the bastion of Blackness. At least Backstreet Boys had the ballad down. “I’ll Never Break Your Heart” anyone?
37. Tim & Erick Awesome Show: FUCK THIS DUMB ASS SHOW. If anyone can tell me why this show is still on and Code Monkeys isn’t I will punch your baby dead in the face because you are a MOTHERFUCKING LIAR. This show sucks; Black Steve was awesome. Die, honkey, die! Priceless!
36. People on bikes: Okay, if you stay out of the road we are cool. But the moment your punk ass steps in the realm of the car, all your rights no longer exist. You know who you are and if you act like you have four wheels you are going to get handled like you have four wheels.
35. Mountain Dew’s “Game Fuel”: Yes, if there is one thing gamers need it is another thing to keep them in the basement and awake playing Counterstrike or World of Warcraft. Mountain Dew is just Satan’s piss anyfuckingway so I don’t see the big deal. Nasty stuff. Now the Livewire was heart-stopping goodness.
34. Cargo Shorts: Okay, unless you handle cargo or use 70% of the pockets for actual shit then don’t wear them. Especially with flip flops or sandals. God, I hate white people.
33. Egg Salad: Mayonaise + eggs – tuna or chicken = NOT FUCKING FOOD. It’s a waste of good eggs. Whose bright idea WAS THIS?!
32. University of Nebraska: Ugh, the Cornhuskers irk the shit out of me. YES I know a lot of this has to do with me being a CU alum but man, I really don’t like that state. Anime Nebraskon will be an event of either boredom or drunken awesomeness because I can’t do Lincoln again sober.
31. CNN: If MSNBC sucks and Fox News REALLY sucks then what does CNN do? Not a god damn thing. The only thing it has going for it is Anderson Cooper and he is a fucking creepy ass albino that needs to have his feet cut off because he is a demon. CNN has very little of relevance on and the good stuff they DO have on is usually done better by the two shittier networks.
30. Triple H: If you don’t watch wrestling then you don’t understand my hatred of this guy. Every six months it seems like Triple H is beating up someone that I would rather be champ (Yes, I am a wrestling fan and yes, I totally want to make the sweet love to Maryse). From RVD to Chris Jericho to Edge it feels like he lives to screw up anything good that comes about. It’s like watching a 50 Cent video.
Well, we are down to the 20’s for the next time which I hope to have up before next week. Want to do it before Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen which YES I will be seeing because I am hoping beyond hope that Shia LeBeouf with fucking die a gruesome death. Odds are no, though. It’s how my life has gone. Until next time, stay up peeps.
Chachi Out
101 Things That Piss Me Off!
We are in the 30’s right now so lets get moving!
39. SPIKE TV: So, um…since when was UFC and shitty action movies the sign of being a man? I seem to have missed the boat on this one and maybe it is because I am 70/30 gay that fluctuates damn near hourly but I have only watched one show on SPIKE and that was TNA Wrestling. And the only reason for that is that there is no America’s Best Dance Crew on. More on the “manly man” bullshit later but Spike has no redeeming qualities whatsoever. And if you say UFC…you gay, boy. Go look at some yaoi and paddle yourself YOU SICK FREAK.
38. Justin Timberlake: Well…I dunno. I mean J-Tim has been working my nerves for about a year now because he is Blacker than I am. Not a shock or a big deal but man I think people need to remember that this dude was the lead singer of N’SYNC which wasn’t the bastion of Blackness. At least Backstreet Boys had the ballad down. “I’ll Never Break Your Heart” anyone?
37. Tim & Erick Awesome Show: FUCK THIS DUMB ASS SHOW. If anyone can tell me why this show is still on and Code Monkeys isn’t I will punch your baby dead in the face because you are a MOTHERFUCKING LIAR. This show sucks; Black Steve was awesome. Die, honkey, die! Priceless!
36. People on bikes: Okay, if you stay out of the road we are cool. But the moment your punk ass steps in the realm of the car, all your rights no longer exist. You know who you are and if you act like you have four wheels you are going to get handled like you have four wheels.
35. Mountain Dew’s “Game Fuel”: Yes, if there is one thing gamers need it is another thing to keep them in the basement and awake playing Counterstrike or World of Warcraft. Mountain Dew is just Satan’s piss anyfuckingway so I don’t see the big deal. Nasty stuff. Now the Livewire was heart-stopping goodness.
34. Cargo Shorts: Okay, unless you handle cargo or use 70% of the pockets for actual shit then don’t wear them. Especially with flip flops or sandals. God, I hate white people.
33. Egg Salad: Mayonaise + eggs – tuna or chicken = NOT FUCKING FOOD. It’s a waste of good eggs. Whose bright idea WAS THIS?!
32. University of Nebraska: Ugh, the Cornhuskers irk the shit out of me. YES I know a lot of this has to do with me being a CU alum but man, I really don’t like that state. Anime Nebraskon will be an event of either boredom or drunken awesomeness because I can’t do Lincoln again sober.
31. CNN: If MSNBC sucks and Fox News REALLY sucks then what does CNN do? Not a god damn thing. The only thing it has going for it is Anderson Cooper and he is a fucking creepy ass albino that needs to have his feet cut off because he is a demon. CNN has very little of relevance on and the good stuff they DO have on is usually done better by the two shittier networks.
30. Triple H: If you don’t watch wrestling then you don’t understand my hatred of this guy. Every six months it seems like Triple H is beating up someone that I would rather be champ (Yes, I am a wrestling fan and yes, I totally want to make the sweet love to Maryse). From RVD to Chris Jericho to Edge it feels like he lives to screw up anything good that comes about. It’s like watching a 50 Cent video.
Well, we are down to the 20’s for the next time which I hope to have up before next week. Want to do it before Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen which YES I will be seeing because I am hoping beyond hope that Shia LeBeouf with fucking die a gruesome death. Odds are no, though. It’s how my life has gone. Until next time, stay up peeps.
Chachi Out
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Father's Day: Even Child Touching Priests Get A Day?! Wait....
What is up, peeps?! I am back and it is time for the 20 biggest videos on this blue orb we call Earth! Let's get started!
20. May J. featuring DJ Kaori, DIGGY-MO, Clench & Blistah - Garden (Last Week #16)
19. Mihimaru GT - Switch (New Entry)
18. Incubus - Black Heart Inertia (Last Week #14)
17. Shion Tsuji - Sky Chord ~Otona ni Naru Kimi he~ (Last Week #13, One Week at #1)
16. School Food Punishment - Futuristic Imagination (Last Week #15)
15. YA-KYIM - Tabun Kitto (Last Week #18)
14. Wonder Girls - NOW (Last Week #11, One Week at #1)
13. Chae Yeon - Shake (Last Week #17)
12. Young Money featuring Lil Wayne - Every Girl (Last Week #9)
11. LM.C - PUNKY ❤ HEART (Last Week #20) [Biggest Mover]
10. Kanye West featuring Young Jeezy - Amazing (Last Week #6)
9. SCANDAL - Shojo S (Last Week #12)
8. Stereopony - Seishun Ni Sono Namida Ga Hitsuyou Da! (Last Week #10)
7. YUI - Again (Last Week #2, Two Weeks at #1) [Plunge of the Week]
6. Se7en featuring Lil Kim - Girls (Last Week #8)
5. Abingdon Boys School - JAP (Last Week #4)
4. Ikimonogakari - Futari (Last Week #7)
3. Maxwell - Pretty Wings (Last Week #5)
2. Tohoshinki - Share The World (Last Week #3)
1. 2ne1 - Fire (Last Week #1, Two Weeks at #1)
2NE1 made it two straight weeks on top while Tohoshinki rebounds back to the runner-up spot. Maxwell comes in at number three and brings R&B back to the Top Three for the first time since John Legend a few months back. LM.C has made the biggest news, hopping up an astounding NINE SPOTS this week! We also have a debut from the returning Mihimaru GT!
See you in seven to see if 2NE1 can make it three weeks at the top! Or will Tohoshinki take the number one spot for boy bands everywhere? Or can Maxwell make the most of his first ever foray and take the throne?
See you next week, peeps!
Chachi Out!
20. May J. featuring DJ Kaori, DIGGY-MO, Clench & Blistah - Garden (Last Week #16)
19. Mihimaru GT - Switch (New Entry)
18. Incubus - Black Heart Inertia (Last Week #14)
17. Shion Tsuji - Sky Chord ~Otona ni Naru Kimi he~ (Last Week #13, One Week at #1)
16. School Food Punishment - Futuristic Imagination (Last Week #15)
15. YA-KYIM - Tabun Kitto (Last Week #18)
14. Wonder Girls - NOW (Last Week #11, One Week at #1)
13. Chae Yeon - Shake (Last Week #17)
12. Young Money featuring Lil Wayne - Every Girl (Last Week #9)
11. LM.C - PUNKY ❤ HEART (Last Week #20) [Biggest Mover]
10. Kanye West featuring Young Jeezy - Amazing (Last Week #6)
9. SCANDAL - Shojo S (Last Week #12)
8. Stereopony - Seishun Ni Sono Namida Ga Hitsuyou Da! (Last Week #10)
7. YUI - Again (Last Week #2, Two Weeks at #1) [Plunge of the Week]
6. Se7en featuring Lil Kim - Girls (Last Week #8)
5. Abingdon Boys School - JAP (Last Week #4)
4. Ikimonogakari - Futari (Last Week #7)
3. Maxwell - Pretty Wings (Last Week #5)
2. Tohoshinki - Share The World (Last Week #3)
1. 2ne1 - Fire (Last Week #1, Two Weeks at #1)
2NE1 made it two straight weeks on top while Tohoshinki rebounds back to the runner-up spot. Maxwell comes in at number three and brings R&B back to the Top Three for the first time since John Legend a few months back. LM.C has made the biggest news, hopping up an astounding NINE SPOTS this week! We also have a debut from the returning Mihimaru GT!
See you in seven to see if 2NE1 can make it three weeks at the top! Or will Tohoshinki take the number one spot for boy bands everywhere? Or can Maxwell make the most of his first ever foray and take the throne?
See you next week, peeps!
Chachi Out!
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Even With All The Bullshit, I STILL Drop Jems Like Jacob The Jeweler!
A little conversation from today...
[20:21] c0mpu73rb0y: There are just too many fucking pictures
[20:21] c0mpu73rb0y: And 70% of them are (to no surprise) of the bride
[20:22] JenovahX80: duh. no one else matters
[20:22] c0mpu73rb0y: Yeah, I know this
[20:23] c0mpu73rb0y: I'm just bitching because I wonder how it is any man would want to go through this shit
[20:23] c0mpu73rb0y: marriage
[20:23] c0mpu73rb0y: And not so much that
[20:23] c0mpu73rb0y: Just the wedding part
[20:24] JenovahX80: because for the most part, men are fucking idiots
[20:25] c0mpu73rb0y: Guys let themselves get into a crazy amount of debt JUST for ONE fucking day that they really don't want to show up for anyway.
[20:26] JenovahX80: dude, men are fucking dumb
[20:26] JenovahX80: only way to explain it
[20:26] JenovahX80: beacuse the logic of it is lost on me
[20:29] JenovahX80: anyway, marriage is like a one sided contract for socks
[20:29] JenovahX80: sure its great to have them, but at the end of the day is it worth signing your life away for a lifetime supply?
[20:29] JenovahX80: when you could just buy them when you need them instead?
[20:29] c0mpu73rb0y: hahahaha
[20:30] c0mpu73rb0y: Best quote EVER
[20:30] JenovahX80: i know, right?
[20:30] JenovahX80: thats going on myspace
And it did. And Blogger, too. Except for Rick; Jen's cool. For everyone else out there...LOVE STINKS! Yeah yeaaaaaaaaaahhhhh!!!!!!!
I'll be back tomorrow, hopefully.
Chachi Out
[20:21] c0mpu73rb0y: There are just too many fucking pictures
[20:21] c0mpu73rb0y: And 70% of them are (to no surprise) of the bride
[20:22] JenovahX80: duh. no one else matters
[20:22] c0mpu73rb0y: Yeah, I know this
[20:23] c0mpu73rb0y: I'm just bitching because I wonder how it is any man would want to go through this shit
[20:23] c0mpu73rb0y: marriage
[20:23] c0mpu73rb0y: And not so much that
[20:23] c0mpu73rb0y: Just the wedding part
[20:24] JenovahX80: because for the most part, men are fucking idiots
[20:25] c0mpu73rb0y: Guys let themselves get into a crazy amount of debt JUST for ONE fucking day that they really don't want to show up for anyway.
[20:26] JenovahX80: dude, men are fucking dumb
[20:26] JenovahX80: only way to explain it
[20:26] JenovahX80: beacuse the logic of it is lost on me
[20:29] JenovahX80: anyway, marriage is like a one sided contract for socks
[20:29] JenovahX80: sure its great to have them, but at the end of the day is it worth signing your life away for a lifetime supply?
[20:29] JenovahX80: when you could just buy them when you need them instead?
[20:29] c0mpu73rb0y: hahahaha
[20:30] c0mpu73rb0y: Best quote EVER
[20:30] JenovahX80: i know, right?
[20:30] JenovahX80: thats going on myspace
And it did. And Blogger, too. Except for Rick; Jen's cool. For everyone else out there...LOVE STINKS! Yeah yeaaaaaaaaaahhhhh!!!!!!!
I'll be back tomorrow, hopefully.
Chachi Out
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