What’s up my sniggys?! I am back to annnouce some big news. Probably the biggest news you will hear all year. Diddy has changed his name….yet again. He now wants to be known as Sean John. Why? No one is really sure, but Diddy is ballin so he can do whatever the fuck he wants. My bad, SEAN JOHN is ballin and he can do whatever the fuck he wants. He could call himself “eatin a fucking butthole”….ALL THE SAME! Should out to the Ol’ Dirty Bastard. One love, Big Baby Jesus.
But I digress. My announcement wasn’t that. My announcement is this. From this day forth, on January 23rd, 2008 I officially decree that my name will now and forever be….
DIDDY
Yes, I called it. One, two, three…DIBS! There, it is officially mine. Now that Sean John is Sean John, I will now (Or until Sean John becomes the symbol for the Euro because he is THAT BALLIN and I can become “Sean John”)be Diddy until further notice. From today, these are the only names I will accept to be referred as:
1. Diddy (Keep it Simple….and Sexy)
2. Dub Diddy
3. Diddy T.
4. D.D.Y. (If you are into the whole brevity thing)
5. Mr. Diddy T.
6. Duke of Diddyvania
7. T. Diddy
8. Big Deuce Diddy
9. Diddy Did It
10. Big Baby Diddy (Because Diddy was and always will be bigger than Jesus)
11. Yddid (Diddy backwards. Say it three times and I do the Harlem Shake!)
12. Didderellie
13. Deuce Diddy
14. His Diddyness
15. Diddy Do Right
16. Diddy Tell’em (TAKE THAT, SOULJA BOY!)
17. Diddyspeare
18. Double Stack Diddy
19. 3D or Trey D (Deuce Diddy Dollars. Yep, just thought of that)
And of course, Diddy Christ Superstar. C’mon! That’s fucking PIMP, DUDE! Either way, from now on Diddy is in the house. Nuff said. The Passion of Diddy will be back. Stay up, peeps.
Diddy Out.
Uh huh, yeah. Take that, take that, take that.
