Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Man, it had to be said....

Alright, peeps. Time for another update. I told ya’ll I would be back a lot quicker now. I’ve had a few days to look at the aftermath of the experience that was X-Men 3 – The Last Stand. I must say, I enjoyed the movie experience. It was nowhere NEAR as good as the second one, but it was better than the first and a lot better than the work Marvel has been putting out not named Spiderman. That being said, every gripe you have heard about the movie is dead on. It is short, borders on campy and just kind of jumps into it. With that being said, it is STILL a good movie and a pretty exciting blockbuster. I still think Superman Returns will be better by leaps and bounds, but that is just me.

Next, I believe it is time for a rant. Now I am sure that you are thinking: ‘Duece, what the hell else could you rant about?’ Hell, I have ranted about Jesus and the handicapped. What else is there, you ask? I am going to go back to an old staple. As you all know, I have come to the decision that common sense is dead. In all walks of life, at all levels, the thought of accountability has been replaced by passing blame and just all around asshattedness. Yes, that is a word I just made it up. Yet, something just hit me today. What if having common sense…doesn’t make sense?

Follow me here, peeps I am going somewhere with this. When I was in college, a female friend of mine and I were discussing political and social views (Yes, I am sad when that is what I want to talk about with a woman. Fucking sue me, I’m lame) and the discussion got on the fact of tuition assistance. I am a black male (yeah, like you didn’t know ) and I could not get grants because:

My grades were too high in high school (Why in the fuck did I try to learn if being stupid gets you into college?!)
My parents made a little too much (Being military, I was a dependent so that is partly my own fault. But my parents were the damn Hiltons, they had bills like everyone else)

She said ‘That doesn’t make any sense!’ Then she said, and I will never forget this; ‘I don’t understand why I went to school, got good grades, didn’t get knocked up and followed all the laws and yet I have to pay full tuition costs while some b***h with two kids by 18 gets grants out the ass so she can just drop out after 2 semesters. Just stupid.’ Now it may have been the alcohol thinking, but I was in love right then and there because she finally saw what I had been thinking for about 3 years. It's easier to be stupid.

Now before you get all up in a tizzy…I don’t care. I am right on this. Laws should be made to protect the innocent, not save the stupid. You have laws for seatbelts and helmets and other common sense things. I am not big on survival of the fittest as much as I used to be (money throws one hell of a kink into that chain of logic) but at some point, people need to learn the consequences of what they do. Think about it: I know my views piss people off (The 3 people that read this thing anyway. Lost a reader yesterday) and yet I know my bounds. There are a few places that I don’t go because I know that:

With Great Power Comes Great Responsibility.

Sounds hokey, but I have used it before because it is a true statement. Who said comic books couldn't be deep? Whether it be the power of words, the internet or money you must know the routes you can go before you are abusing power. The greatest power humans have is free will because it is the most volatile power out there. Free will has changed the course of history more than anything (IMHO) else, and if you can’t use common sense in its most BASIC form (like not peeing on minors), how can you even begin to comprehend rational thought. I’m just saying. Long story short, we should NOT coddle stupid behavior. My original point (Yeah, I got sidetracked by a shiny object) was that common sense is not worth having because it is easier to be a dipshit. While that might be true, it is not the RIGHT THING TO DO. Ignorance spreads faster than intelligence. Remember that peeps. In closing, ACT LIKE YOU GOT SOME GODDAMN SENSE PEOPLE!! I'M THROUGH PLAYING AROUND WITH YA'LL!

Well, that is all for now. Break time and all. Just had to get that out. I will TRY to get something up when I get home. Till then, stay up peeps.

Chachi out.

Tuesday, May 30, 2006

I Keeps It Real, Fool! Real Dumb.

First things first: I officially apologize to the Marvel fanboys that read this blog. 120 MILLION DOLLARS IN FOUR DAYS?! Holy shit, I had no idea people loved the X-Men so much. I honestly liked the movie and I have to send a personal apology to Brett Ratner. I will send your kitten back ASAP. What can I say, I know when I am wrong and I was hella wrong about it sucking it hard.

With that being said, I want to return to the Da Vinci Code for a minute. As you all know, I loved that movie seeing as how the ‘albino monk bitch-slapping a nun’ ration was the highest ever. With that being said, I think I have a new word to bring to the masses. No longer will I use the derogatory words to describe the female gullyhole (Except yak. That word still rules all). From this point on, the word for vagina is:

Chalice

Yep, you got that right. I am putting that in the daily vernacular of the Duece. Gimmie that chalice, girl! See, it flows like H2O already. You know, I should charge for being this damn awesome. Yet, I do it all for the peeps. I’m up to six readers now! So whoever you are in Spokane, welcome to the Chachi Show! Hope you enjoy your stay, we have complementary punch and pie for each meeting.

Now real quickly before people begin to ask me what in the hell I am doing. I am going to become a rapper. They always say know your enemy, and no one has been at war with rap more than I over the last three years. Might as well join them. I am working on songs (I actually wrote half of one on the FREX this morning. It’s like Jennifer Lopez, rapping takes no skill at all!) and I am tentatively naming the album…(you ready, Griff)...CON-PHUNK-TATION!

Hell yes, I am bringing it back like Big Wheels! Man, I ain't said that word since the 12 grade. Aaahhh, good stuff. So far I am working on a song called ‘(No Cure For) The Boogaloo Flu and I tell you it is TIGHT BANGING. Now I just need a beat and someone to sing the hook and I am in business! Well, I may be back to drop some videos and rant about the Chalice this evening (see, I go full circle on these things) but if not, stay up peeps.

Chachi Out.

Monday, May 29, 2006

Sometimes you gotta charge it to the game...

Morning peeps. Fuck, am I tired. The sucky thing about being up early to go to work is that when you don't have to go in you STILL wake up early. I slept about 2 hours on Friday night (with no hangover) and 2 more on Saturday night (with no hangover) and drove to the airport and got lost on East Colfax while trying to get off I-70. By the way, black people don't scare me but I can see how they can scare people who aren't used to seeing the scowling. Do niggas have to mean mug ALL THE FUCKING TIME? I mean seriously, life ain't all ballwhacks and eye pokes so quit acting like it. Smile sometime, it takes fewer muscles to smile than to frown. So turn that frown upside down and think of rainbows and gumdrops. Holla at 'cha boy.

So a friend of mine truly hates James Blunt. It seems that the English happen to agree with him. You know, I do like You're Beautiful but I luckily listen to an MP3 deck so I can listen to him when I want to instead of 3 times an hour which I am sure they do on the radio. You know, if American radio stations had the balls to do this kind of thing against 50 Cent, Nelly or T.I. (and I love that dude to death but I really don't 'know about that' and I really don't FUCKING CARE!) I might still love hip hop. Nah, with people like Rick Ross keeping the ignorance flowing like Cristal, rap will continue to SUCK IT HARD. I mean seriously, is rapping even hard anymore? I used to say it was easy to rap but hard to be GOOD at it. It seems that so few people even try anymore than if you can make words rhyme that aren't the same WORD you are the next Rakim. How can you rhyme 'hard' with 'hard' and expect to be any good? How about 'tard' because that is what you are. Congrats, Rick Ross. You are officially the newest rapper on the 'Sucks It Hard' list. Hell, I may have to go in reverse and create a list of rappers that DON'T suck because that will be a hell of a lot easier. The list of crappy rappers is longer than the list of rappers that have banged Karrine Steffans. Hell, even Ray J hit that and I don't know what the hell he does.

Oh, back to James Blunt. Um...yeah he's tolerable. I can see how he can be annoying to some because his voice is special. But I am going to divulge something to you, peeps. As you know, the last two weeks has been rather teh suck and I have been having a rough time. So I went out and bought two albums to get over it: T.I.'s King and Daniel Powter's album. And you know what? The both KICK ASS. I already downloaded T.I.'s album and knew what it was all about. I said it was lackluster but it was the advance copy and half the songs werent mastered or were shelved altogether. The official release is rather good. I hated 'Why You Wanna' when I first heard it but it grows on you after about five times. You don't know how many times I wanted to tell a girl that she was with a sucka emcee and needed to drop the zero and get with a hero. Peeps, whoever can name the movie that line is from gets a Chic-Fil-A sandwich. Anyway, check out some T.I.

T.I.ger Woods, ya'll. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Screw you, that shit is funny. Anyway, back to Daniel Powter. I bought T.I. because I was pissed off about a situation and needed some anger management music. After I was able to release that anger (Saturday afternoon/evening) I had my own pity party where I pined like a punk bitch for half a day. I had been listening to Bad Day by Daniel Powter earlier in the week but I never really LISTENED to it. After listening to it and the album on the way back to the Springs from D-Town Saturday night (at like 2am, great stuff) I realized that song wrapped up all my issues and problems in a small little package and let me throw it out the window on I-25. I think I hit a deer with my sorrow. Better my baggage than a semi, I guess. The rest of the album ain't too shabby either (kind of a Rob Thomas meets Nickelback feel to it) and it really changed my mood. I don't think I have ever had this song up before. I'm sure you have heard it (radio loves this kind of song) so here it is in video form. Bad Day by Daniel Powter:

I know there are some people out there that hate this song. I can understand why, it is rather redundant. But you know what? Music is for the heart and soul. If you feel it and the music touches a nerve or generates an emotion then I cant hate on that. Those of you asking about my double standard with 50 Cent can eat my ass, btw. NO EMOTION is generated from 'In Da Club'. Except rage.

Now that I have gotten some things out of my system, it's time to rant. It has been a while since I have ranted for the peeps mainly because I am tired when I get in. However, this needs to be said. Now you all know my stance on religion: if it gets you through your life and gives you direction/peace then I am all for it. Just don't push your shitty values on me and sure as HELL don't tell me that your deity is the one true path to heaven/enlightenment/nirvana/Portland or where ever the fuck your special happy place is. I made the mistake of watching VH1 on Saturday morning while getting ready to head out of the house and they were talking about a show with Kirk Cameron. Those of you not familiar with him, he was Mike Seaver from Growing Pains with a best friend named Boner. Yes, they said Boner on TV in the 80's. Anyway, this asshat has a show about how to communicate the word of the Lord-ah and Jesus-ah to the masses that have enough common sense to know to stay away from anyone that would WATCH A SHOW ABOUT HOW TO COMMUNICATE THE WORDS OF THE BIBLE TO RATIONAL PEOPLE! Herein lies the problem with some (not all) followers in religion.

In college I wrote a paper in my Philosophy of Religion class about rational thought and the Bible. My point was that the Bible is about belief, not about objective thought. Really think about it; the bible is a story of fables and anecdotes that you live your life by. In my opinion, that should be IT. People believe the stories in books of worship really happened but can't (or won't)grasp the concept of evolution? Bitch please! At least we have proof of evolution: 50 Cent and K-Fed being the missing links in the evolution chart:

You look me in the eye and tell me they don't look like a stepping stone in evolution and you would be a fool ass LIAR. Evolution is seen as false by most religious bodies. Yet the bible had raining frogs, plagues upon plagues, dragons, horsemen, talking bushes, a dude that split a SEA and a Jew that was beaten and nailed to a cross and didn't complain ONCE. That is bullshit, we all saw the Hebrew Hammer (and if you didn't shame on you because that shit was HILARIOUS). It is just funny to me how selective people can be in what they believe.

So you ask: Duece, what do you believe in? Well, that is a very interesting question. All I can say is this: I have in the last 8 years looked at Christianity (Catholicism to be specific), Buddhism, Islam, Judeism (Hey, any people that will do what they did to Jesus is a team I want to be down with because they don't PLAY), Mormonism and Scientology. After doing research, I really don't think I could be down with any team. It is kind of how I feel about politics: I don't affiliate with parties, I affiliate with my beliefs and stances. If a Democrat is for rights of Americans to be able to aquire guns legally easier then I am for that person. If a Republican is for the placement of Affirmative Action in schools where more than 90% of one race makes up a student body then I am for THAT person. In religion, I cannot say that I could believe in ALL the rules and expectations for one religion because for the most part they are all the same and secondly they (for the most part, there are some sects that don't follow this) believe their religion is the 'true' way to get into heaven. I find that stupid, personally. I believe that if you live your life the best you can and just follow common sense (no killing people, no peeing on minors, etc.) that you will get into 'Heaven'. The fact that people think that their 'God' (no matter which religion) is petty enough to not let someone into eternal peace because they didn't give to the church or blow themselves up in their name is not a 'God' I want to worship. I'd rather go to fucking Detroit, and I HATE THAT PLACE. Never been, but still it just seems like a hellhole.

Quite simply, my point is this. People that follow an organized religion are cool. However, I also believe that just because you don't go to a house of worship doesnt make you any less of a person. The fact that believers feel that because they read a book that they are getting into the club is totally asinine. There are people that dont go to church that are better people all around in terms of being fair and just than regular church goers. Yet, because they don't believe in an organized body of faith they are gonna go to hell? Bullshit. You know, someone in my class told me that just because you don't believe in Hell doesn't mean you can't go. Well, I responded that the exact same goes for Heaven. If I happen to be wrong and there IS a heaven and I have been a good person I believe that just do to phrasing that I would go there, right? Someone correct me if I am wrong because I haven't read the Bible in YEARS. Oh, and like I said before I don't categorize all devout people as smug, elitist fucktards. Unlike some people out there, I don't believe in making a general assumption about a segment of people due to the actions of a few idiots and basing a life view on that. That would be DUMB AS FUCK, WOULDNT IT?!

Man, that was cold-blooded. I guess I shouldn't have went there but what can I say. You know, I have like...three maybe four female readers and I have been told this blog is abrasive and not very female friendly. Seeing as my lady troubles are WELL documented in previous entries (I got negative feedback about my women being stupider than zeebras analogy) and in conversations with the readers, I wanted to make this right. So for the ladies, I looked high and low for a poem to show you how much I love you. I have found those words. This is dedicated to the sexy, sexy ladies in my life. Over the age of 18, of course. Except in West Virginia and Kentucky. I ask you...what is love?

C'mon, ladies. That was funny. *sigh* Fine, I'm sorry. I am not taking into account your feelings and whatnot. Well, I guess that is the story of my life. As I mentioned earlier, it has been rough times in Duece City. For those that know me and know my rough month or so, I want to say big ups for putting up with me being a total punk bitch for that time. Well, those days are over. Gonna have one last song and let it go. All I have is six words....DRU HILL HELP ME SING IT!!!!

Ah, now that makes me feel a LOT better. Like I said last night, sometimes you gotta realize you did something stupid, chalk it up as a loss and charge it to the game. Man, I hate charging to the game.

Anyway, this has been a hella long holiday post so I am about to head out for a spell and enjoy the rest of my day off. I will try to be back up on Thursday or Friday for ya'll depending on how long I stay up on D-Town. Until then, stay up peeps.

Chachi out.

Sunday, May 28, 2006

Stand and Deliver

Ok, I know it has been a while peeps. Like I said, pretty fucked up week last week and this week was no better. I want to sulk, but I have a higher calling to answer to. No, not God you dumbass: the peeps. To my four readers (FUCK YEAH! Coming up in the world, fools!) I am back and I am gonna drop the knowledge for the masses.

First off, about my prediction that X-Men 3 - The Last Stand would suck it dry. Well, I was partially wrong because it passed the first test: I didn't kill Brett Ratner. I was really expecting to have to end that man's life for fucking up a sure fire comic book franchise (see Kevin Smith with Daredevil, Ang Lee with Hulk and James 'Needs To Be Raped Analy with a Porcupine' Cameron with Batman Forever/Batman & Robin) but he actually did an average job and let the characters and action do the rest. The movie didn't need to overhaul the characters (like Batman Begins did for Batman) so the story was simple, the action was satisfactory and the movie flowed quickly because of it.

However, it moved WAY TOO QUICKLY. At only 108 minutes (an hour and forty-eight minutes for those unfamiliar) it clocked in shorter than the previous two X-Men films and all the Marvel movies released except Fantastic Four (thankfully, because that movie SUUUUUUUCKED. Even Jessica Alba in tight clothes couldn't save that shitfest) and Elektra (a movie whiched proved the theory that 100 monkeys with 100 typewriters can smear feces on a piece of paper and that movie will be greenlit because Hollywood is fucking stupid). Due to this time lapse, the movie had no real character build up for the non-fanboys that were already aware of Psylocke, Kitty Pryde, Caligstro and the Juggernaught (bitch!). Odds are, most people didn't care so that point is probably moot but I still think that 2 hours would have been sufficent to mention that maybe the Juggernaught is Xavier's stepbrother. Just nit-picking, it was a great action flick and well worth the watch. It is still behind Thank You For Smoking, but it is the second best movie of the year so far. At least until Superman Returns comes out.

My fucking god, this movie will RULE ALL. I really can't see how they can screw this up. I mean I see how they can (putting Wendy, Marvin or Krypto anywhere near this movie is a good start of crapifying this movie) but I am sure Bryan Singer has the right idea and has directed a masterpiece.

Now, on to a personal note. Readers of the blog know that for the most part, my life is an open book and whatever I say and do I stand by. That being said, for those that know me, you know that I have been partaking in a drink here and there. Fuck it, I have been getting sloppy ass drunk lately. I will be the first to say that I have done some dumb ass stuff while drunk. Or sober, they kind of run together as of late. That being said, I am NEVER going to blame anything stupid I have done on anyone else because I knew what I was doing was stupid when I did it. When I look back on the dumb shit I have done, I chalk it up as a loss and charge it to the game. I know that next time, I might not want to do that again because I may lose track of large chunks of time, screw people up for a while or end up taking advice from a talking dog. Yeah...mushrooms aren't just for pizza. That dog also told me to by stock in Apple but I didn't listen.

Crap, it's getting late and I have only slept for about three hours since Thursday. I will try to get enough brain waves to put something up tomorrow. Stay up peeps.

Chachi out.

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

Well It's About Damn Time...

Evening, peeps! To all five of my readers, what the hell is up?! Can I get a 'laffy taffy'? I sure as hell better not lest I whip your ass. I STILL hate that fucking song. Anyway, I must say that today was rather 'bleh' until I saw this link on the Superficial (which BTW is a kick ass site). What can I say to Katie after reading this? To quite the characters on Drawn Together:

AH DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

Katie, it's about damn time you saw the light. It isn't all that bad, at least you are carrying The Dawson's baby and not Tom's. Hang your hat on that, you didnt even have to have sex with the nutcase Smurf and you STILL get some money out of the deal. See, sometimes life can be poetry.

Aw, crap. Both Lost AND American Idol are on. And it's their season finales! Do I give a shit? Nope, time to watch the NBA. Crap, it's Steve Nash. Sigh, guess it's time to watch Grandma's Boy again. You know, it may just be me but I really want to see Ryan Seacrest mauled by bears. Much like terrorists, bears never go after the REAL enemy. I'm sure that people would be cool with grizzly bears if they went and ate the intrails of the cast of Party of Five rather than children. Okay, maybe that is a reach but...

What in the fuck are they doing to Don't Let The Sun Go Down On Me?!

You know, if I killed those freaks right now, no one would convict me. THEY ARE BUTCHERING A CLASSIC FOR RATINGS! Holy shit, is that Clay Aiken? Wow, is it just me or does he look GAYER than usual. Nothing against homosexuals, but the new derogatory phrase for 'gay' is now officially 'Aiken' because he is just gayer than Gayzor Mountains with a gay pride parade watching The View on Barbara Striesands' birthday. I mean GOD DAMMIT.

So Al Gore is so serial about global warming. You know the Manbearpig episode of South Park (after watching it again) is one of the funniest of the last two seasons because I think Al is at Tom Cruise/Mel Gibson/Mariah Carey levels of crazy. I mean that nigga is CRAY-ZAY. And of course you want to talk about global warming with MT-fucking-V. Isn't this the same network that pimps rides? Have you ever seen them pimp a hybrid? Hells no! Hypocracy to its fullest, that is MTV.

Speaking of videos or lack thereof seeing as how MTV doesnt do that anymore, where am I supposed to hear about Pearl Jam albums? I never hear them on the radio or see ads in record stores. Seeing as how I haven't LIKED a Pearl Jam song in a while I guess I shouldn't complain. The reason I haven't liked a Pearl Jam song in awhile is because I havent HEARD a Pearl Jam song in a coon's age. Just bitching about thatl. Someone give me a heads up on how this (and oh, their last FOUR albums) sounds if you could.

So X-Men 3 is looking a LOT better now. I'm not sure on how it is gonna be, but it won't be Elektra or Daredevil bad. I was fearing the worst but it looks like everything will be coming up Milhouse this Memorial Day weekend on the movie front. Just waiting now for Pirates and Superman. Then I can die happy.

Pablo Francisco. Nuff' Said:

This dude needs his own show. He is funnier than Mencia and isn't as annoying. Yet, David Spade has his own show and...yeah I've never seen it either. Oh, this is special. I guess its been around for a while, but Nolan and Zach told me about it and I decided to put it up. Prepare to be offended. Not any more offended than you are at the rest of my bullshit, but still.

HOLY SHIT IT'S PRINCE ON AMERICAN IDOL!!! THERE IS A FUCKING GOD!!!

You think Prince dunked on Seacrest and served that bitch some grapes?

Yeah, God bless the internet for letting me know that Prince was on or elss I would have missed the purple one and never forgiven myself. Well, it is almost bedtime for the Duece. I will have something up over the weekend, if not then avenge my death.

AVENGE ME!!!

Chachi out.

Monday, May 22, 2006

Man Without Fear

What's up, peeps. I'm back again today, trying to give you all more updates than once a week. I'll drop jewels for you when I can. With that being said, two big things today. First off, seeing as I haven't been able to get to the comic book store for a spell, my box was rather full. I FINALLY got to read the final issue of Infinte Crisis and I must say, it was pretty good. Not as good as Indentity Crisis (which some hated but I dug, especially with Tim Drake's dad dying. The scene with Tim and Bruce was just priceless) but it was well worth the 26 months it took to fucking complete. I mean seriously, meet a deadline. The ending was interesting, and kind of a take off from the original Crisis on Infinite Earths with what happened to the Bart Allen (Impulse/Kid Flash). Not only that, Superboy Prime killing Conner Kent was JACKED. I couldnt have given a rats ass about Connor, but Superboy Prime was a total dick and needs his ass whooped. I mean seriously, take a look at it and see. All in all, the seven issues were pretty good and I am sure they will be reprinted soon. If any of you peeps are comic fans, check it out.

Secondly, I saw the trailer for Fearless at the Di Vinci Code and I just downloaded it yesterday. All I can say is that even only an hour into it, I will see this movie TWICE in the theater. Jet Li kicks ass AND acts in this bad boy, and it is kind of based off of history to boot. Don't forget, this was back before Woo Ping and wire fighting. They did that shit FOR REAL. So far its pretty good, too bad they cut out about 35 minutes of it. I haven't noticed it yet, but I am sure all of a sudden it is gonna skip to 2005. I'll keep the peeps updated.

For those that have been keeping up with Bleach...is anyone else bored right about now? It just seems to be filler and lack of excitement. Ever since they left Soul Society the series has been SLOOOOOW and it is beginning to bug me. They better pick up the pace before they hit DBZ levels of stagnancy. And I ain't gonna watch if it gets that shitty. Actually, I havent had much time to keep up on anime because of the drive to D-Town.

You know, I don't have much to rant about today. I'm just a little tired. I may be back up tomorrow. Until now, sorry so short. Thems they breaks. Stay up, peeps.

Chachi out.

Sunday, May 21, 2006

Breaking the Code

So, I know it has been a week since the last update. All I can say to that is rough week. No sleep, awake all the time and really confusing. I would tell you more, peeps but I'd rather not. Let's just say that life ain't a fucking box of chocolates, it's a quandary wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a question. Much like women are.

Speaking of boxes of chocolates, I saw the Da Vinci Code yesterday and it....really wasn't bad at all. I read the book when it first came out (I can't read! I'm not a loser!) and haven't touched it since. As a matter of fact, I think I loaned it to a classmate and never got it back. Anyway, the movie was very good if you never read the book. Think about it:

Doc Ock? CHECK
Magneto? CHECK
Insane Albino Monks? CHECK
A nun getting her ass WHOOPED ON by the aforementioned Albino Monk? CHECK
No Heath Ledger or Colin Farrel? CHECK
Theories that match my own about Jesus just being a hippie with cool ideas instead of a Jewish Keanu Reeves? CHECK
Thinly veiled vagina and penis jokes? CHECK
No Bears? CHECK
Somebody FINALLY serving those bible freaks that feel that murder is justified ONLY if it is for their cause? FUCK YEAH!
No black people? CHECK
Tom Hanks sporting the stupid-ass Steve Nash look? CHECK, and worth a hearty chuckle.

Just by those points alone, this movie is tolerable. Then add in the fact that Tom Cruise was NO WHERE NEAR IT and you have a movie that is well worth watching. I was disappointed there were no protesters. I would figure a movie that questioned the very BASIS of Jesus being the son of God would have had at least ONE fucktard telling me I was going to hell. At least then I could have brandished the beating stick and claimed self-defense:

'That kid was gonna beat me with a bible! I had to protect myself! By hitting him 74 times in the ribs and leg with a stick. Officer, kids are cunning I had to act fast!'

Eh, maybe not. Wow, I really crossed a line there. I guess that is what makes me so damn awesome. All in all, The Da Vinci Code was a good movie (not up there with Grandma's Boy or Thank You For Smoking) that is worth the watch. And Christians: let it go. It's a FAKE movie about a book of...stuff. Get a grip, Opie (Ron Howard) is not questioning your beliefs and Dan Brown is not Solomon Rushdie. It is a fucking movie, give it a whirl you might like it (except for the man ass in the beginning. AWKWAAAAARD) After what George Lucas did to Star Wars, I believe that Star Wars fans have more of a beef about bastardizing a book than Christians do. Did you SEE Revenge of the (Steaming) Sith?! BASTARD! If this were in it, the movie may not have sucked it so hard:

What the hell is an Aluminum Falcon?! Priceless. So a long time ago (January, I think) I posted how much loved the Jesus Dance webpage. Well, a while ago I got an e-mail from the creator of the website saying he was taking it down due to pressure and other factors. Well, that site KICKED ASS and I am pretty sure that Jesus cut quite the rug in his day. With today being Sunday and the Da Vinci Code being in theaters, I figured today is the day to give Jesus some props. I bring to you a mirror to the Jesus Dance. Oh, and that song is classic.

Speaking of songs, I guess my J-Pop collection is gonna get a little bit bigger. I know I said last week that I was gonna have to cut back because nothing new has been released in a while. Much like fall of 2005 when I gave up on hip hop (Two words: Nelly's Grillz) but Common, Mos Def, Talib Kweli, Kanye West and Little Brother came out back-to-back and made me a fan again, I have been drug back into J-Pop. You peeps may (or may not if you are new to the blog) know of Sowelu from an earlier post in the blog (I think 'Dope Space Chachi' was the entry) when I posted the Live from Budokan clip with M-Flo when they performed So Exclusive. She also did I Will, a closing theme to Full Metal Alchemist (4th season I think. I posted earlier it was from Samurai Champaloo but that was a different kick ass song altogether). Check it out:

That song was my jam for a minute. Anyway, Sowelu has a new single and it is some poppy goodness. I ordered last week online and just put it on my iPod and I must say, this song is very happy. And hey, I'm a happy guy. I give to you Sowelu with Dear Friend.

Crap, I'm just gonna say it: that video is fucking cute. I will not use kawaii to describe that video, but it was just so damn...happy action fun time. Yeah, great stuff. Looking forward to the album, too. If I can ever find out when it is coming. The second person that has me back on the J-Pop train is Namie Amuro. Now I have been a fan of Namie's for a while, I even put up with that Pink Panther bullshit from her previous album so I must say I was looking forward to this. I preordered the single (8 bucks is fucking STEEP, but eh Namie is worth it and there is a sweet remix and b-side on it) and got it on the 18th. All I can say is...hells yeah. The song is catchy and very hip-popish, which I am digging lately. Whoever does her beats needs to do some stateside, IMHO. I am sick of every other beat being Kanye, Pharell or Just Blaze. Anyway, Can't Eat, Can't Sleep, I'm Sick is a kick ass jam. Just downloaded the PV and it is not to shabby either. Check it out, peeps. If you like hip-pop you won't be disappointed:

I STILL think she needs a sandwich, but I'm not gonna complain. Very attractive young lady who I would like to take out for coffee. For the peeps that have been on this blog for a while, have you noticed how her dancing is becoming a little less robotic? Unlike Hyori Lee (who moves like her dance steps are installed in a microprocessor and sodered to her damn skull), Namie is looking very seamless in the dance move department. It's about time because I was gonna start comparing her to Jessica Simpson in the skill department and that ain't good.

So, while updating my iPod I found an older song that I am wondering about. If there are any anime fans reading this post: whatever happened to the group that made Gessekai? I know this song is from Nightwalker (which I STILL haven't seen, mind you) but I haven't been able to find much out about them since. This song RULES ALL, mainly because it has a Depeche Mode feel to it that I dig. Little known fack: I used to LOVE Depeche Mode. Seven years overseas will do that to you. Anyway, check this song out. The video leaves a lot to be desired but the song is bad ass.

Yeah, that's a meditator right there.

So I am watching MTV Jams for a second (they had A Rollerskating Jam Named Saturdays by De La Soul on. Who knew MTV played good stuff in between the SHIT?) and...where does one rap video end and the next begin? They played a block of videos and I thought it was all one video just a change of cities. It is really awkward, because I can not defend the statement that 'rap has gotten stale' because it REALLY has. The Rick Ross Hustlin, DJ Somedude Holla @ Me Baby, T.I.'s What You Know (and dont get me wrong, T.I. is my dog) and Dem Franchise Boys 'Ridin On' feel like the SAME DAMN VIDEO and for the most part are the same damn song. Everything is STILL about cars, chains, women and money. Ignorance is STILL spreading. To take what Common said and kind of make it my own:

'We tried so hard to break away from whips and chains, yet we strive to get whips and chains and STILL don't understand the pains.'

For those that DON'T know, whips and chains are cars and jewelry. We teach at The Passion of Chachi, as well. Even worse, I went to Best Buy to ask about the new Gnarls Barkley album (the Danger Mouse/Cee-Lo collaberation) and they looked at me like I was nuts. When I told them what the album was, some random black dude said 'Man, Cee-Lo sucks now. That nigga aint even a rapper no more.' So, to keep from gouging his eyes out I just said I would try another store. You know, I LOVE how Cee-Lo ain't real beacause he branches out into new realms of music but 50 Cent can make a shitty movie and still be beloved by dumb ass youths of all colors. Well, fuck them Cee-Lo kicks ass and so does Gnarls Barkley. Here is my free advertising for the week. I give you Crazy:

Yeah, I prefer that over that shitty "Best Friend" song or the new Mobb Deep any day.

News flash...Mariah Carey is still batshit-crazy. Not as bad as she was or up to par with Tom Cruise or Mel Gibson (he has been quiet but this is the calm before the storm) but she is still a few eggs short of a full dozen. Just had to get that out. Speaking of crazy, Ray Nagin was re-elected as the Mayor of New Orleans. Yep. I got nothing on that one. For the first time ever, I have nothing to say. Wait, I do:

(O_o)
WHAT IN THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?!

*Sigh*

Well, long update today. Hopefully it will tide you over until the next update (either Wednesday or Thursday). Chachi is busy, tired and hella confused right now. Left is cheese and north is Cambodia. Hopefully I will get normal this week. Oh, I will be up on Saturday to give you a run-down of X-Men 3. Like I said, if this movie sucks I am going to go ballistic on someone. Anyway, stay up peeps.

Chachi out.

Monday, May 15, 2006

I guess crap is still crap, even if you don't see it.

What is up peeps? Late update today, seeing as how I get back about two hours before I have to fucking leave again. Eh, thems the breaks and all.

So I'm laying a bit off the J-Pop for a while. Not due to lack of liking, just due to a slow few months of releases. Bennie K and Orange Range have new stuff coming soon, but for the most part it is just UVERworld and M-Flo and as good as they are even I need variety. So what am I into now? Shitty songs that almost no one remembers but me. Yeah, it's hard to find some of the songs I liked back then, but when I do it is frickin sweet.

That being said, anyone remember that whack-ass animated cat in the Paula Abdul video for opposites attract? Well I do and it did indeed suck, as did the feline. That cats; name was MC Skat Kat. I can't make that up, but it's still better than 50 Cent and Crunchy Black. How can a rapper be named after a response for 'how do you want your steak done?' Anyway, it seemed he used that cameo to vault into (minor)super-stardom and bought his G-Unit-esqe posse The Stray Kay Crew (I think that was right, like it really fucking mattered. They are still better than the St. Lunatics and Skat Kat is marginally better than Nelly). Skat Kat actually recorded an ALBUM and had a minor hit single in this song here. Get ready to feel bad for Earth Wind and Fire folks because they bastardized a sample for Let's Groove Tonight with this classic ditty. Here is Skat Strut by MC Skat Kat.

Even at this bad a quality, you get the idea. Not gonna lie, I have been jamming to that for about a week now and I feel ashamed. At the same time, he's better than T-Pain. The second song I have been listening to was more out of research than anything else. I was trying to remember the lyrics to this song and happened to actually find this video. Then I laughed. ALOT. To think I actually used to tolerate this song. I dont think he had another hit, and for all intents and purposes it doesn't matter: he had one hit and that is all that matters. I had a single in 1996 called 'Work That Thang Like A Choo-Choo Train' but it never took off. Fucking Quad City DJ's stole my thunder. Who remembers 'The Train?!' WHOO-WHOO! Any-damn-way, I give to you the king of the nasty. The lord of the freaks. You can call him Freaknasty. I call him crap.

Check out the dancing robot! Freakzoid on the dancefloor, fools! Yeah, I'm reaching for good points, that song is GOAT ASS. But hey, back then if you wasnt dippin, you was trippin. Okay, peeps. I'm gonna level with you. Back in the day, there was a song that came out. A song that I dont know why, but I just couldn't not listen to it. I had to bump this song like they were gonna ban it. Seriously, it was my goddamn e-mail address. This song was so damn stupid. Just listen to the lyrics:

He aint ya boyfriend
He aint ya husband
Just sumbody u can call when your body needs a fix
He'll put u in tha mix
Den you'll hear him askin
whats my name say my name

Peeps, spell his name. Say his name. Splackavellie.

Man. That was bad. If you remember that song and your name aint Griff you get MAD PROPS. The Chachi respects your ability to handle pain.

So I missed the Bush speech (I usually do, I would rather skullfuck a cactus than listen to him) but after getting the long and the short of it...did you know there is a third accuser in the Duke rape case? Just goes to show, sex is bigger news than immigrants. Dude, MSNBC RULES!! They are giving away tips on how to beat a polygraph test! Let's see Fox News do THAT. See, that's why I watch it. The speak directly to me, since I am their only viewer and all. Nice to be appreciated.

Quickly back to Bush. With everything going around in the news from Iran to Iraq to Chris Daughtery getting booted from American Idol (to which I say BULLSHIT!), illegal immigrants are one of my non-factors right now. And the sending troops to Mexico means we are more interested in keeping Mexicans out than helping Iraq. I think that gradually all the troops from Iraq end up at the border and Bush is going to totally ignore the 'Pottery Barn' rule. If you don't know what that means, please look it up or read The Boondocks. We here at the Passion of Chachi don't really endorse reading because we aren't losers, but learning can be fun. Stay up, peeps.

Chachi out.

Sunday, May 14, 2006

The Mother of All Posts

Happy Mother's Day, peeps! To all (er, both) moms that read this blog, today is your day! Enjoy it because tomorrow it is back to being taken for granted. Man, that's gotta suck.

So anyway, it is rant time. Zach, Ted and I went to Circuit City yesterday so I could get my mom her gift and stood by the glass case where the iPod was and stood there. For thirty-five minutes. THIRTY FIVE FUCKING MINUTES. Now part of this is my fault, because I should have just walked out an took my business elsewhere. But so some reason, I decided to stay. Just to see how long it would take them before they realized that I was not being helped. If it was a drinking game and took a shot for everytime I saw an employee look at me and not acknowledge I was looking to purchase and item I would have been sloppy drunk. Like I was on Friday. WHOA, I have no idea what I said or did, but I apologize because....I was to' up.

Anyway, Ted took a catalog and called the corporate (CORPORATE) number RIGHT IN FRONT OF AN EMPLOYEE to lodge a complaint. Nothing happened. I was still standing there right in front of the case while a pack (five) employees stood talking about some fucking camera on the opposite side of me. The customer service rep Ted talked to CALLED THE STORE and asked what in the fucking hell was going on. It still took 10 more minutes for them to acknowledge me and get my item. The killer: they went to Zach (who is white...er, caucatino but he LOOKS white) first, and he wasn't gonna buy anything. Then after all that, Ted asked to speak to the store manager and was given the Operations Manager (which in laymans terms means he manages the backroom and has nothing to do with the store itself for the most part) to which we both said was bullshit because we both worked retail and know the chain. They finally bought over the ASSISTANT store manager or 'second bitch in charge' and I have seen more of a sense of urgency to apologize for their poor customer service from Bush apologizing for the NSA bullshit. This man couldn't have given a rats ass about how shitty his store was to us and almost refused to give us the name of the store manager. Finally we got a card with a name and a phone number. No store number, no business number, no nothing.

You know, I know that the rantings of an upset customer mean very little to a retail chain. For everything I don't buy, they can replace me with another customer. That's just reality. However, I can say FUCK CIRCUIT CITY and ask my peeps to say the same. Go to Best Buy. Go to Wal-Mart. Go to Ultimate Electronics. Hell, go the the hustle man (I won't lie, I used to get cologne and DVD's from the Jamaican hustle man in 2001) just don't go to Circuit City. You know, what pisses me off is that I buy a lot of stuff from Circuit City. I bought my last two CD decks for my car, my first iPod, my DVD player, my old Compaq PC and both my TV's from there. In retrospect, I spent an hour in there each time, not because I wanted to but because the ASSHATS WOULDN'T HELP ME. Sad that I had to buy my deck to get help because they know we blacks love the drums. That is the only place a Black man can get help in an electronics store: car audio. Now THAT is racist. Might as well have slapped me in the damn face with some red Kool-Aid and a chicken wing. So lastly:

BOYCOTT THE FUCK OUT OF CIRCUIT CITY.

That is all on that. Well, in line with Mother's Day I am going to give you TWO rants today. I'm a giver. I've been neglecting the peeps and I owe this to you. I am going to start a new segment of the blog called 'Common Sense Is Dead Because...' to go along with Underrated/Overrated (which will be coming this week, actually so stay tuned). I am bringing this on here because...well common sense is FUCKING DEAD. Speaks for itself. Anyway, on the first installment:

COMMON SENSE IS DEAD BECAUSE...we shake babies.

O_o

You know, I bitched about this all last week so people that know me already have heard this. If you have to be told you SHOULDN'T shake a baby, your dumb ass shouldn't have HAD a baby or be around babies because you are officially a braindead fucktard that needs to be mercy killed, not just for your own good but for the rest of society as well. You are a walking blot clot of stupidity and should not be allowed to take up precious air that John Ritter or Pat Morita would be breathing right about now.

Think about this logically. If a polar bear grabbed you and shook you like booty in a Ying Yang Twinz video, would that feel good? Would that cause a little damage to the brain? You bet your ass it would. Now multiply that by 10. That is the result of shaking a baby. The only things that should be shaken in this world are snow globes and Polaroid pictures. ICE COLD!! Sorry, I still love that song. The fact that people have to be told this is kinda scary. I mean, I get pissed off like no other (ask Griff about my Madden tirades) but I would never shake a baby and never would be told NOT to. I understand kids being told because kids can be hella stupid. I was a kid once, and I did some dumb shit. These ads are being aimed at adults, who should honestly know better. There is no gray area with baby shaking. It's just common sense to not shake a baby, the fact that we need to be told is just sad. That's just my opinion.

So, enough about that. Oh, update! I got the Bennie K Show video online (gonna buy it when I get a region free DVD player) and that is some pretty good stuff. They did Love Story and Better Days and ended the special with Sunrise. Oh, and Yuki and Cico are...hells yeah.

So I saw this link on VGCats last week and thought it was stupid as all hell. After watching it again, it may be the funniest thing I have ever seen. I AM NOT A MACODDITY!!

GIRLS ARE GRODY! You know, Dr Tran will rule the box office this summer. Hot dickings for all! Hell yeah.

Now, for a very important update. Ahem.

NEW KUMI KODA! NEW KUMI KODA! NEW KUMI KODA! NEW KUMI KODA! NEW KUMI KODA! NEW KUMI KODA! NEW KUMI KODA! NEW KUMI KODA! NEW KUMI KODA! NEW KUMI KODA! NEW KUMI KODA! NEW KUMI KODA! NEW KUMI KODA! NEW KUMI KODA!

私は、Kumi Koda 愛する. I have no idea what that means, but I hope it's 'I want to take you out for some coffee and maybe to a nice musical, Kumi Koda'

So I'm a hypocrite. Although I am against shaking babies, I'm all for throwing them at cats. I should be ashamed, but not suprisingly I am truly cool with it. It's great to be me sometimes. Also, it has been a while since we heard from The Rock. Check out Gridion Gang, it's like Coach Carter but without Sammy J. And that kid with the afro, he freaks me out a little.

What in the hell happened to females in R&B? Aside from Mary J. Blige and Alicia Keyes, everyone sounds the damn same. Think about it, name some of the new 'R&B divas' out there:

Ciara (Not a good singer, an good dancer though)
Keisha Cole (Tries WAY TOO hard and is still just average)
Brooke Valentine (Hot as all hell, not the greatest singer)
Tierra Marie (Forgot about her? Me too)
Um...Rhianna? (Once again, damn fine but an average singer)

See, running low on options. I have already ranted about the state of males in R&B. How shitty have the males in R&B become? One word, one letter, all shit: T-P.a.i.n. or 'Terrorbeast Predalope Assface Ingrown-ugly Negro'

My god, I just figured out the punishment for baby-shakers: be forced to wear glasses where T-Pain's face is all you see for 30 days. THAT is punishment. I swear, T-Pain will be a frontline soldier against the Bear Uprising because that face could scare any beast of any size. Oh, and thanks to R.Kelly for shitting on the memory of dead R&B stars everywhere with the classic line "Put my whole damn head in it". That will be remembered with 'Make Me Wanna Holler' and 'What's Going On' as R&B gold. You just pushed the movement back to 1871 with that one. Guess it is back to the fields for us. Ignorance, it is spreading like...well, the legs of a stripper. I had to do it.

Okay, that is enough for today. Just had to let the peeps know I still care and I am still down for the revolution. Oh, one last thing. Nelly Furtado is back and all I can say is GOD DAMN!! I have been in love with this woman since I'm Like A Bird, although I still think she needs to eat a sandwich. She is STILL a lovely, lovely woman IMHO.


My god, those eyes. I LOVE THOSE EYES. Just...get lost in those. So, here is her latest video, Promiscuous. She looks SO GOD DAMN GOOD I can't concentrate. Oh, and check out Timbaland. This dude is on the Barry Bonds Workout Plan or something because he is DIESEL.

That woman is hot tottie. Anyway, I am gonna head out for a bit and enjoy mother's day. I will try to put something up on Monday or Tuesday, depends on how tired I am. Stay up, peeps.

Chachi out.

Tuesday, May 09, 2006

Wow, that was fast.

Yeah, I hate to hear that. So i just saw that my laptop will be here tomorrow. Kick the ass. Hopefully I will be home before UPS closes or someone will sign for it.

So November 17th is SUPPOSEDLY the release date for the PS3. And at a ball-breaking 600 DORRA! That is JACKED, especially if it aind Blu-Ray compatible. They are making it hard to want that system. That is until I see this:

Man, that is Final Fantasy XIII. THIRTEEN. Can you say 'fuck yeah' because I can. The fact that Sony has such a stranglehold on my video game console dollar is a testament to how big of a lead they have over Microsoft in this market. Aside from Nintendo's die-hards (of which I am one except for the SNES, and that was more because I was a teenager and my mom said either that or the Genesis and I chose blast processing over Street Fighter II) they have the majority of gamers waiting for this unit. Even with the controller LOOKING EXACTLY LIKE THE ORIGINAL.

Maybe DC/Time Warner threatend to sue because it DID look oddly enough like a Batarang.

Speaking of Nintendo, I am sure that the few readers that are into games have heard about the name change of the Nintendo Revolution to the Wii. All I can say to that (which hasnt been said by every other site and blog on the net. I'm sorry, I just dont update like I used to) it's a good move. Everyone is talking about it and it is revolutionary (Especially the 'always on' feature. That will be great for games like Animal Crossing and Nintendogs. Which if anyone out there really loved me would get me that for my birthday) to boot. And at reportedly $250 according to the net (and VGCats, which is sadly along with Fox News where I get my news updates) it is a FUCKING BARGAIN compared to the hype-machine that was Xbox 360 and the wang-tease that is the PS3. I know I am there, especially with the Zelda, Mario and Metroid games. See, Nintendo gets sales just due to its first party titles. If the third-party developers jump onto it (like maybe Metal Gear Solid, I think the controller would work well with the game mechanics like tossing grenades and sniping) it MAY compete with the PS3. Then I see this:

And realize that I may have to beat up a small child to get a PS3 because it will rule all. Man, I better stop before I find the MGS4 trailer. Too late:

So yeah, how much blood do I have to give to get this thing? I'm gonna need a lot of cookies. Oh crap I forgot to pick up Grandma's Boy! Dammit, I'll get it tomorrow. Funny ass movie, too.

Speaking of movies, although it's late here is my review of Final Fantasy: Advent Children's American release:

Don't bother.

Seriously, the voice acting (aside from the English Vincent and to a certain extent Yuffie because Christy Carlson Romano is kinda hot) is way below par and the extra features look like they were made by the same software I used to make a copy for a friend of mine (who if you are reading save the 20 bucks and BUY ME NINTENDOGS!! Not a demand, just a suggestion). If you haven't seen the original it is worth the buy because the original Japanese track is intact and the movie for the most part is unedited. However, Barret sounds like Mr. T and Cait Sith sounds like a punch drunk Scotsman so if you can get past that be my guest. There is a pretty decent recap of the story using game footage and voice clips from the voice actors (Vincent has me dying with what he told Cloud to tell Yuffie) and a preview of the new games coming out. In short, not recommended unless you are a true fan of the Final Fantasy series.

Well, I will try to be back on tomorrow if I get home at a reasonable hour. Before I go, greatest webtoon EVER. Wish I knew about these guys when that ninja rear-ended me in 2004. Anyway, stay up peeps.

Chachi out.

(Update: More Bennie K, fools! I will have this DVD shortly and I will put more up soon.)

Monday, May 08, 2006

A quick little post.

Yo yo! Late update again, peeps. Better late than never, though. Well, the bus ride ain't THAT bad, just a little on the long end.

So my laptop should be here on Friday. To that, I say FUCK YEAH. Next week it's all Bleach and Prince of Tennis on the road. Damn, this is going to kick ass. Oh, and after the verbal abuse I laid on Motorola, they shipped my headset on Friday. It's been sitting in Denver since Saturday, but that is neither here or there. I'm still pissed that had I not called, odds are it would still not be here because it was in a 'pending' status until I happened to ask. Even still, I would have been out 99 bucks and they would have had a unit that they are just going to refurbish and resell. Since I am sure they get bulk discounts through carriers (FedEx, UPS, DHL, etc.) it would cost them NOTHING to fuck over a customer like that and they wouldn't even care. Hell, I have bought 3 headsets from them and all crapped out, and I'm willing to wager that some other people have had the same problem. I would also figure that due to the shitty warranty of having to send it back on your own dime that most people just say screw it and buy a new one. That way, they make out like bandits. Sad, but true.

So on to something a little bit sadder. What in the hell is Nicole Kidman's problem?! I'm telling you, that fruity little cult has gotten her, too. Nicole, fight the feeling! He is crazy, you HAVE to stay away! Oh, and by the way: thanks for not seeing MI:3 peeps. I know a lot of people saw it, but not as many as I figured. Now just do this for the Mel Gibson shitfest and everything will be good as gravy. Also, I forgot to put up the new Superman trailer after I commented on it yesterday. Check this out:

Hells yeah. Unless they bring in a talking Krypto or the the Wonder Twins, this movie will RULE. For those who think I am going all fanboy for Superman are right. But it still has a lot to live up to to beat out Batman Begins.

So after a few weeks of searching, I found the release date of the new Bennie K DVD. It comes out tomorrow, but I don't have a region free DVD player yet so it's all moot for now. Yeah, I know it has been a while since I had some Bennie K up. They are still the mad notes. Check out a live rendition of Sunrise:

Oh, how I have missed them.

So, to go along with the MTV Movie Awards and Douchebrawl 2006 I am working on something. I want to create 'The Chachis'. Awards that go to things and rule, but also things that suck. Because things that suck need to be recognized, so that they know of their suckitude and they will be avoided like a pulled-pork sandwich at a Muslim block party. More on the idea as it comes to me. If you have any ideas, you know what to do. Drop a line.

So something hit me today: Nick Cannon, Wilmer Valderrama, Ashton Kutcher, Cameron Diaz and Paris Hilton all have had prime time shows in the last 18 months or have been shoved in our face like the nether regions of a stripper very recently. Even sadder...people watch those shows. Now I haven't given any show (except Nick Cannon's because it had Cedric the Entertainer on and he my cousin) a chance but I am sure the Brokeback Mountain theory works for them. What is it about shows with people who are famous for being stupid (Ashton), whores (Paris) or just overall annoying (Wilmer) that is so popular with the younger crowd? Is it because that's all there is, or are the 18 year olds of America that fucking inept? Now I watch my share of stupid stuff (don't you dare say Korriki because he rules) but I know at the end of the day that I am losing braincells by watching it. People think these shows are good. I just don't understand it. Maybe I give people TOO MUCH credit. One show that falls in that category that is pretty good is So NoTORIous. That show is so sad it is funny. All this time I thought Tori had no talent. I was right, but she better than her competiton.

Well, it's time to get something to eat. I will try to put some stuff up tomorrow. Seeing as how I get home at about 6:30 and have to be back up at 4am, let's just say that I will try my best. Until then, stay up peeps.

Chachi out.

Saturday, May 06, 2006

This post will self-destruct.

Yo yo, peeps! I FINALLY have a morning where I don't have to be up by 4am and I wake up at 4am anyway. Not gonna lie, I feel like crap right now. Throat hurts and my head is killing me. not sure how in the hell I caught a cold but what can you do. I should be better by tomorrow, just gonna chill out for a bit.

So, MI:3 is out and...I really don't want to see it. I have honestly never seen any of the Mission Impossible series, and I am the ONLY person in America that hasnt. After sitting through The Last Samurai (which would have kicked ass if Tom Cruise was replaced with Keanu Reeves or a broomstick) I honestly can't remember the last Tom Cruise vehicle I sat through. I know it is just me, but I am not a fan of the guy as an actor. Aside from Interview With A Vampire and The Last Samurai, I don't remember the last movie that he was in that I liked. What is scary is that the reviews have actually been pretty good so people may actually see this thing. *Sigh* can't win them all.

So I just saw another trailer for X-Men: The Last Stand. And I must say, Halle Berry made the right movie leaving this franchise. If the dialog is staying the way it is and the action scenes look like this in the finalized product (which is three weeks away give or take, so it seems like it will stay this way) this movie will SUCK. Elektra suck. Daredevil suck. HULK SUCK. Look at this clip:

Now fanboys may fill the cup for the fastball special, but I for one am NOT. That was fucking lame. Brett Ratner has officially fucked up a sure thing. This movie has lost the Bryan Singer touch, and that's what made the first two movies great. It kept true to the feel and look of the original characters but made them easily accessible for non-comic book fans. With an established franchise, all Ratner had to do was just follow up the second movie with an all-out brawl between the Brotherhood and the X-Men with lines being drawn between Magneto and Xavier. Instead, he actually put in INPUT. I am afriad I am going to hear Wolverine tell Colussus 'No one understands the words that are coming out of your mouth!' Please let me be wrong and this movie ends up ruling all, but it doesn't look like it so far.

On the other hand, I did squeal like Asian women for David Bowie (yeah, that's not cool) when I saw the new Superman Returns trailer.

My fucking GOD! Kevin Spacey has made up for K-Pax. Aside from Kate Bosworth as Lois Lane (She is not bad, but Rachel Bilson as Lois Lane? THAT'S a two cup filler right there) I think this movie will be better than the original Superman. Not as good as Superman II, but it will be up there. Man, DC has released 2 comic movies in 2 years and both have (and will) kick ass. Marvel has been hit or miss over the last few years with good (Spiderman 2), bad (Punisher) and 'bleh' (Fantastic Four) offerings. Meanwhile, Batman Begins was the best movie last year and maybe of this decade so far. Yeah, I fucking said it, brought the can, opened it and set it on the table bitches. Argue with that choice and you will be wrong. DC is now my new anti-drug.

Oh wow I forgot to say something about An American Haunting. Ahem....don't see it. You know, two years ago, every movie was a comic book movie. Last year every movie was computer animated/generated. This year every movie is a horror movie. Why in they HELL do they keep making this crap? Who sees them? If any of you saw and enjoyed:

The Ring
The Ring 2
Saw
Saw 2
Stay Alive
House of Wax
Hostel

Fuck it. If you saw any movie with a screaming female lead and a eerie, spooky force that kills people for no reason, you are a dipshit that needs to be eliminated to keep you from reproducing. People like YOU keep Grandma's Boy from getting theater time. Sodas in schools and godlessness aren't destroying America. Shitty horror movies and their chromosome-damaged fans are.

Well, I gotta run and get my oil changed and hopefully get a haircut. Enjoy your Saturday, peeps.

Chachi out.

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

Yeah, It's been a while...

Alright, first off let me apologize for not updating the blog. I know that there are three or four of you that actually come and I have been neglecting you. For that I am sorry.

Now to the good stuff. You know, 'the day without immigrants' has come and gone. And you know what? I barely noticed. Aside from the fact I couldn't get lunch (from a Mexican food resturaunt btw. Nothing racist, I'm just saying) it was a normal day. Me myself I am ALL for illegal immigrants because...well why the hell not? People say they are a drain on society but so are prison inmates and children. No one complains about them, well children anyway except for me. Needless to say, I understand they movement.

So, the new Bleach is up today and I am SO ready to see it. Been two damn weeks since my last Bleach viewing and I needs my fix. I also downloaded Prince of Tennis, that despite the name is a very good anime. Too bad its 162 episodes deep and I have to play major catch up.

Okay, now to the big problem I have: FUCK MOTOROLA. As I stated in a previous post, I was having problems with my third (yes, third) Bluetooth headset and I had to send it back (by my own fucking dollar) to Motorola for a replacement, which I was told would take 7-10 days. Well, with the new job I hadn't had a chance to get back to them (mainly because they are open bankers hours for no apparent reason) but yesterday I realized: I havent had a headset for 20 days! So I called them and gave my case number and got put on hold and waited. And waited. And waited. For 15 minutes. At that point, the young man (I would say 20ish) came back on and said the order JUST GOT PROCESSED. At that point, I blasted him with about 4 years of battles with Motorola. I felt like a tool, too. There was nothing he could do and all he could say was 'I'm sorry'. I feel bad when customer service reps have to apologize for the shitty business practices of their employers. I have been there, and it is teh suck. So, I am boycotting Motorola and every chance I get, I amd giving them the finger. I hope they can see it, I am doing it as hard as I can.

So, my desktop is wigging out sometimes. I am going to buy a laptop and it is gonna be SO badass. I have always wanted a laptop so I will let you know when it gets here. In two fricking weeks. Yeah, I must say I don't miss the IT industry at all. Even so, it's gonna be great to have it on the FREX ride and when I get my spot. Yep, everything is coming up Milhouse.

My god, American Idol singers get worse every year. I havent watched in a while, but I don't think I have missed much. I have it on as background noise, and I'm sure sodomized howler monkeys sound better. Just my opinion. Oh, and the in-show advertisements? Yeah, I am never buying anything that is ever on this show out of spite. I ask of you to do the same, peeps.

Well, I am sure that those of you than know me have heard that I won't shut the hell up about UVERworld. Well, too bad because they kick ass. Got the album and I will place some songs from the album up to stream probably tomorrow. This song will be up there, you bet your ass on it. This song is also on the Bleach PSP game (which according to chatrooms is one of the few games worth a shit on the system) and keeps me occupied during the long trip to Lakewood. Here is Chance by UVERworld.

Good stuff. Just finished ordering my laptop and...yeah it's a beast. Three longest weeks EVER, man. EVER. Sad since all I will use it for is Bleach, pron and Aqua Teen. Eh, thems the breaks.
I gotta get up at the break of dawn again tomorrow, so I am heading out. Stay up, peeps. I will try to update more often too. Just been too damn lazy to get on the ball. I'll hit ya'll up tomorrow or Friday.

Chachi out.