What is up, peeps?! Depending on my motivation I am going to start typing and see where I finish. First, I want to continue what I started last week. We have made it into the 40’s of…
101 Things That Piss Me Off!
We are getting closer to the end of this, so let’s keep it moving!
49. Flirty Girl Fitness: Sigh, this is part of the reason that women’s duality equals their lack of progression. Honestly, I think I touched on this prior but it needs to be explained to women that you cannot be so blissfully ignorant and still expect people to give a shit about you or your opinions. Honestly, the next person that I see say this is a good idea but then insult a stripper is getting cunt punched. I may not LIKE rappers but I don’t steal what they do for my own gain. What is even better is you aren’t gaining anything. Being fit? Get married, then it won’t matter anymore. Vanity is the name of a Prince protégé and THAT IS IT. ZING!
48. The Jonas Brothers: I don’t really know of their work but all I know is that I think they suck. Mostly because one of them dumped Miley Cyrus and she will so be my baby boo in 2010. Gotta mess up a Jona Brother for hurting my future baby mama!
47. The Cancellation of Pushing Daisies: WHAT THE FUCK?! I knew this was going to happen and I touched on this before but man…why is this show off the air? Yet “Lost” and “Heroes” are still out there sucking up the airwaves. America, I fucking hate you. There, I said it. This is what you got rid of:
You got rid of Kristin Chenoweth and her fine ass. FUCK YOU, PEOPLE. FUCK YOU AND YOUR ASSHATERY.
46. Saturday Mornings: Remember back when Saturday mornings included multiple bowls of cereal, hours of animated goodness, an hour of Saved By the Bell and Soul Train? Well, those days are over and it pisses me off. Not for me, but for the children. I mean what can we expect for the future if all that is on is kids battling monsters. You wonder how Michael Vick got his ideas? I’ll tell you: Pokemon. Think about it.
45. Popped Collars: God, people are still doing this shit? Only two people can do this: The Fonz and E-40. And aint none of you the Sultan of Cool or 40 Water so STOP IT NOW. Before I staple the collar to your fucking shoulders to keep it there.
44. Green Day: Take U2, divide the talent in half and divide the pretentiousness by about ½ and you have Green Day. God, I have never been a fan but when people TELL me I should like them because of…some unexplained reason that only Rolling Stone and MTV know I have a huge problem. “Dookie” is a long time ago.
43. KAT-TUN: Okay, I really dig American boy bands but Japanese boy bands really arent my cup of tea. Which is shocking because Tohoshinki and even SMAP is good (Albeit in small doses). Something about having your own cartoon and not being MC Hammer kind of turns me off. That and I hate the three songs I have heard from them.
42. Greenpeace: I swear, you little shits make me want to find the first baby seal I see and fuck it WHILE I club it. I am so sick of you motherfuckers stopping me on the 16th Street Mall asking me if I give a shit about the endangered species de jour. Fuck you and fuck the cute little animals. Let’s try saving hip hop first. Then I will give a fuck about the star-bellied sneetches you brain-dead fuckwits.
41. Magic Johnson: My god, you make basketball unberable. If John Madden had an equally stupid Blackbrother with the uncanny ability to not only restate the obvious but butcher the most simple analysis and add in the most nonsensical input since the fucker who desided it was a good idea to let Craig Ehlo guard MJ one on one…it would be Magic Johnson.
40. ESPN: To go along with the previous point, ESPN has gone from somewhat entertaining to so full of itself I get more sports information from Stephen Colbert. I don’t understand how a network so dedicated to sports can only really focus on…one channel set. It seems like everything is on ABC or ESPN sports-wise and if you arent on those networks then you don’t really exist. I got more NHL coverage from the Canadian clerk at the 7/11 than I did from ESPN and he even has a strong ass mullet to make it all authentic. And I got a half-priced Red Bull once. ESPN has its favorites and that is fine but just sit back and say it. You are LOCATED in New England and you support New England sports teams. Call it like it is. More on Bawston later…fuckers.
Well, I need to head out as I work today…and have to be up in like 5 hours so I am out for now. I will try to get to the 20’s by Friday and get to the Top 10 by next week. Stay tuned, peeps! Also, depending on the bus ride I may do a blog this week at some time. Copper kind of lit a fire under my ass and it has been about two months since I have done one. So look forward to that (Maybe) and I will be back soon.
Chachi Out
