What is up, peeps? It is Sunday and it is time for a weekly wrap up! First off, it is time for yet another double-header edition of…
Master Chief Captain Chachi Goes Hollywood!
Evan Almighty & 1408
So on Friday night because nothing else was out, Zach and I went to see Evan Almighty. As one who didn’t see Bruce Almighty in the theaters I wasn’t really a fan of the movie. Except for Morgan Freeman being God. I bought him more than George Burns. That is not a knock on “Oh God! You Devil!” I am just saying. The man is 308 and still kicking. Anyway, after watching the movie there was some good, some bad and a whole lot of God.
The movie was funny (in parts) but there really isn’t much you can do with Noah, seeing as the story is straightforward. You build an ark, animals get on it, that’s pretty much all there is to it. However, what saved this movie were the individual performances.
Steve Carell is a lot better a character actor than he lets on. Much like in The Office or 40 year Old Virgin I believe that all his roles are in some way an extension of himself. That may not show range, but for the role it was spot on. He never was an unlikable character, which is what Jim Carrey was in the first one. The scope is different (Bruce was given the powers of God while Evan was given the powers of…Noah) which played a role of course but despite the lack of depth to Evan, it worked for the purpose. Meanwhile, Wanda Sykes and Jonah Hill were funny in their roles and John Goodman invokd the spirit of Walter for his role as the evil Congressman Long.
However, all told the sum of the performances don’t equal a great movie. The combined roles didn’t make the movie totally enjoyable because the plot just…happened. He makes a prayer, God answers, he builds a boat, animals do funny things, climax with CGI, ending with a moral (literally). I know that is what is SUPPOSED to happen but there could have been more fun to it. The movie kind of just happened.
Nowhere NEAR as funny as the other major comedy of the summer (Knocked Up) and isn’t even in the same league as the most rockingest movie ever (ATHFCMFFT) in the hilarity department. All that being said it wasn’t a bad movie. Just not a summer blockbuster and not as funny as I would expect from the combined cast. Worth a watch as a matinee, though. The Chachi gives this movie…
6.5 Out of 10!
(The movie is by the numbers, but it IS by the numbers and funny. Don’t expect any side-splitting humor (like Shrek 3) or a fun family thrill ride (like Ratatouille) but it is a very enjoyable movie.)
So after a little disappointment (I didn’t HATE the movie, I was just expecting a lot more from the cast) I went to see 1408 on Saturday afternoon and first off I must say that anything with Samuel L. Jackson starts off with 5 motherfucking stars. Seeing the trailers, I was expecting “The Sixth Sense” meets “The Ring” minus the goodness of the previous and multiplying the suck of the latter. Yet…I was pleasantly surprised in retrospect.
This may have been a case of expecting nothing and getting something so you are more satisfied. Which may be true but this movie was pretty enjoyable. I can put this as the top horror/suspense/thriller of the summer without even seeing Grindhouse or Hostel 2 (and I never fucking will) just based on the story. Now there were parts left dangling like Don Rickles’s neck fat (What brought on the change in his writing style, his original book, all the property damage to the room that happened throughout the movie makes no sense) but a lot of that is just nit-picking on my end.
At the end of the day, John Cusack actually did a great job showing the mental breakdown that room 1408 could cause someone. Even though he does kind of go all over the place, that is kind of what the story and role entails. Sammy J, although he has a short time on screen gets his role across early and sets the tone of “maybe he SHOULDN’T do this” right from the get go. The movie is paced excellently (when he hits rock bottom is when he finally breaks through) and the ending is interesting to say the least.
Overall, it was a good movie. A good weekend matinee and so far the best movie if you are looking for any kind of summer tense-fest. I didn’t jump ONCE and it wasn’t scary as much as it was kind of tense. Worth checking out, if for nothing than to hear Sammy J yell “It’s a motherfucking fire!” The Chachi give “1408”
7.5 Out of 10 Stars!
(Your best bet so far if you are looking for some suspense filled summer fun. The plot is a bit disjointed to say the least but the ending once you think about it leaves you vindicated after the jacked up trip the movie itself is. Nowhere near as bad as it had the chance to be, actually enjoyable.)
So I have my new computer ALMOST up and running. I had to get new speakers (the sub was sounding funny and only two worked so it was about time anyway. Six years is a LONG TIME) and a new DVD Burner but aside from that all my stuff is up and running. My hard drive wont fit STILL but I was prepared for that. My software is all up and installed and despite what I have heard, I have had no problems with Windows Vista. As a matter of fact, I like it a little better than Windows XP. If people went to Apple because of Vista you are a mouthbreather because it is easy to use and simple to navigate if you used Windows ME (Which sucked depending on who you ask. I had it and had no issues with it but to each their own) or have two brain cells to rub together. Let me address some complaints people have told me while I was out (I had a lengthy discussion about Vista at Best Buy yesterday while waiting for Nolan to get off work). It is now time for a new installment of Passion of Chachi!
Chachi’s Tech Talk!
This Week: Windows Vista
Problem #1: It’s Slow!
Well I heard that from three people at Best Buy bitching about how they liked XP better. I asked all of them how much memory they had. They all said one gig. Well, if you know anything about computer you know that memory is your resource that your computer draws from to complete/run tasks. Your processor POWERS the computer but the memory lets it do stuff. If you think one gig should do you then you are an r-tard. I mean it sucks but new tech calls for more resources. Just the way it is. I have 2Gb of memory and I am kicking ass and taking names. Hell, I found a place to get 1GB chips for $35 so for about $70 I will have 4GB of memory and I will be good to go for a bit. So if you are out there running Vista on 1Gb of memory then you deserve to run slow because YOU ARE SLOW.
Problem #2: It’s Confusing!
Yeah, initially it is. I was lost when I first booted up (Took me a minute to put in my sound card and needless to say I was pissed off for a while) but after a while you realize that nothing much has changed. If you have been running any version of Windows (which 90% of you have I guarantee have) over the last 15 years then you know what to do. Not only that, it has a pretty convincing Classic view that can alleviate those that fear change. Once you tinker around with it, you get a pretty good feel for it and I like how the taskbar shows a preview of what is in the window. This is a legit gripe but all OS releases ARE confusing when they come out until you get through it.
Problem #3: All Those Warnings! I Can’t Do Anything!
You can turn them off, shut up. Those you can’t have ALWAYS been in Windows and they are on Macs, too.
Problem #4: Nothing Works!
Well, I installed 8 programs, codecs and clients on my computer and you know what? All of them work. If you want to run “Hello Kittys Summer Adventure Island” that ran on Windows 98 it might not work. All the components I have added (firewire, Soundblaster, DVD burner) work just fine as well. Not sure what people are adding or if you are familiar with what the hell you are doing but for the most part it is plug and play. Besides, nothing works on an OS when it is released! Once again, after a few months all the patches and updates are released and everything is alright.
For the most part, if you have used Windows in the past you can navigate Vista. If you can’t, read a book or tinker with it. It is kind of idiot proof so you have to really try to fuck it up.
Well, I have to run and do some errands for work tomorrow. I do have one thing to talk about quickly. Not many of you know who Emyli is, but she was on that m-Flo and Diggy-Mo song “Dopamine”:
And on “Loop In My Heart: with M-Flo and Yoshika:
Like I said a while back, she can WORK a skirt. Well, she recently turned 18 (last year actually) and she has officially become a woman:
All I can say is DAMN. Just…DAMN. I really wish she would wear more clothes (not everyone NEEDS to be Kumi Koda) but I really cant complain because she is damn fine. DAMN FINE. She has so grown up…I think I am going to cry. Oh, and Crystal Kay is creeping up on Yuna Ito levels of perfection:
I have so missed you, baby. I will sleep well tonight. There should be a special edition of Master Chief Captain Chachi Goes Hollywood this Thursday as I think I will see “Live Free or Die Hard” Wednesday night. Until then, stay up.
Chachi Out.
