Yeah, it’s filler day. I felt bad about no update yesterday and I have to give you the business if you know what I mean. So I’m sitting here working (yeah, I do that every once in a while. Let me just say that Excel may suck but it is making my job a hell of a lot easier. Thanks, Billy Gates….you dick) while listening to my iPod when I came to my cartoon theme songs folder. Yes, I have one. Then it came on: The Snorks theme. Hey, I wasn’t a FAN of the Snorks but they were pretty cool. And they came on before Galaxy High when I was in Rome, New York and THAT SHOW KICKED ASS. My teammate (who is in his late 30’s-early 40’s I’m guessing) had no idea what a Snork was while the lady next to me (who is quite nice. I’m sure she’ll mace me though) was all like ‘Hells yeah the Snorks!’ which got her 20 more Hot Points in my book. Then we got to talking about cartoons and I realized something. Everyone knows about Jem (of which I have as a ringtone on my phone for Jen, but she is smart and never calls me), Transformers, Darkwing Duck (Rick’s ringtone) and even Volton (GREATEST RINGTONE EVER!!) but there are so many shows that ruled that had a sweet theme song that no one remembers.
So, as I reflect on my youth being an old man and all, today I have a special treat for you. Today I rank my favorite kids show TV themes! Some you may have heard and seen, most you will not have. So today I give you a special Thursday mid-day post…
Chachi’s Top Ten Kid’s Show Themes…That You Odds Are Never Heard Of.
#10 Denver the Last Dinosaur
Okay, for a long time I hated this show. But the theme song is TIGHT BANGIN! He was my friend, your friend and so much more. Although a dinosaur odds are would have ate you quick. Hell, he even played guitar! GUITAR! Beat that! Nothing says 80’s cool like a dinosaur in sunglasses.
#9 MASK
Alright, Griff was right. MASK was the lamest cartoon with the lamest toys EVER. They were even worse than Go-Bots. And you know how much I hate them. That said….this song kicked ass! I literally would watch the intro and turn the channel to…um…Jem and The Holograms part of the ‘Action Hour’ with The Inhumans and Bigfoot. M-M-M-MASK!! Yeah!
#8 California Dreams
Okay, I will admit. I had a thing for Jenny Kwan and Diana Uribe on this show back in the day. Only reason I watched it. That and this SWEET ASS theme song! This was back when The Heights was on the air (free soda for anyone who can name the lead singer and the name of two songs by the guy! Yeah…I dubbed the album from a friend of mine. SO LAME) and there was a band on every show. Didn’t they form a band on GI Joe? I think they became Fall Out Boy. Even still, I LOVED this song…and kind of still do.
#7 Hammerman
MC Hammer + Cartoon + Dancing Shoes + Bad Ass theme song = classic. Nuff Said.
#6 Pole Position
Much like Disney will make a movie out of a theme ride (Pirates of the Caribbean, The Haunted Mansion, anything with Lindsay Lohan because everyone has rode her. WHOA!) in the 80’s every video game had a show. From Dungeons and Dragons to Zelda (both of which RULED) it was the rage. Combine a bad ass Atari game with a bad ass intro with TALKING CARS (worked for Hasselhoff) and you have the 6th best cartoon theme ever. I don’t think anyone even WATCHED this show, but it surprisingly ruled. It so sounds like A-Ha made this song.
#5 The Wuzzles
Okay, confession time. I had a Bumblelion. Not like a long time ago, either. I think the cal mauled it in 2004 and I had to get rid of it. This show actually wasn’t that bad and was a kind of novel concept. Well, not really but I liked it. And I think Kenny Loggins sang this. He sang my birthday song in 1987 for Christ’s sake. Even still, this show was good stuff and yes it is on the iPod.
#4 Galaxy High
I loved this show! Listen to it, it is SO 80’s IT HURTS! I used to watch this at 10:30 every Saturday before the almighty Transformers and man it was cool! The theme song just screams Flock of Seagulls, doesn’t it?
#3 Silverhawks
Yes. YES. YES! OH GOD YES!! Now we all know I hated the toys (biggest case of false advertising EVER with that invisible ship) but the cartoon was bad ass! And the theme song? Hells yeah! Part metal, part real, ALL AWESOME!
#2 Hello Kitty
First off, DON’T YOU DARE JUDGE ME. Helly Kitty rules all and you know it. If rules your god damn face! I used to watch this show all the time in Italy and even had the pens and stationary. No, it’s not gay it’s awesome. If Hello Kitty is gay then yeah, I am gay as all fucking hell. If I had this song in better quality it would SO be my ringtone. I was kind of mad the characters had mouths and talked but I was just happy to see it here.
#1 Swan’s Crossing
I used to watch this show after Yearbook everyday while in High School! We used to do…the…dance and everything. Yeah, I’m pretty damn lame. Even still, this show was awesome! The episode when they had the intervention and that guy drove his scooter off a cliff with Sarah Michelle Gellar on the back? Priceless! Big ups if you remember this show!
There are some that I wanted to put on here such as the intro to The Roundhouse (SNICK, fools! WHAT!), the intro to the Alf cartoon (bet you didn’t remember THAT ONE did you?!) and Toxic Avengers (They’re GROSS but they still get girls! According to the song, anyway) but that is another time. I will be back tomorrow (or late tonight) with the Chachi Top 20 Video Countdown. Until then, stay up peeps.
Chachi Out.
