Colorado Springs, I am disappointed in you. Last year I had a post about how Denver was the #1 drunkest city in 2006 (Which I will take the majority of the credit thank you very much because if you knew me…I threw the fuck down!) and 2008 according to Men’s Health. I also told you that I wanted Colorado Springs to be #1 for 2009. Well, the tally is in and once again, CSP has failed to deliver. We are still #3 (Behind Milwaukee which is a given) and I just wanted to voice my overall disappointment in our performance. Now as the leader of “Let’s Get Loaded For America 2009” I will take most of the responsibility and shoulder the blame. I should have worked you harder. Practiced more often. I mean Denver has three major sports team venues in a prime area for drinking and Colorado Springs doesn’t have that.
Still, I have to say that you all gave it the college try. We tried our best and sadly we couldn’t overtake the drunken douchery that is Denver. But 2010 is a new year. It is time to take the crown away from Denver once and for all! This is going to take a lot of training and hard work. You will need to drink. A lot. Not just on Fridays and Saturdays. You may have to pull some weekdays out to make this dream a reality. You will work harder than you have ever had to before but in the end, it will all be worth it to be a champion. A champion of drunkenness. And it will feel good, I mean after the massive hangover wears off. Then, and only then will we be able to have our own Super Bowl Shuffle:
You can be The Fridge. Not Jim McMahon, I am the punky QB, not you! Training starts Saturday, peeps. Works out great because it’s the Florida/LSU game and playoff baseball should be on. Remember, YOU’RE THE BEST!
Around…nothing is ever going to keep you down. Except maybe a few bottles of sake. It will be worth it. Now follow me to immortality! Stay up, peeps.
Chachi Out
