First off, I'm still lost on the Darth Vader Battle because I am STILL not versed on anime like I should be. I really hate tripling up (doubling up already seems like a cop-out) on the same series, but if I don't get some suggestions I may have to do that. Also, Starscream from Transformers is out and Skar from The Lion King is in. If for nothing else, being the catalyst (bweh heh, cat) the second movie to make me cry in a theater. Asshole.
Speaking of the theater, I saw Thank You For Smoking last night and all I can say is this. GREATEST MOVIE EVER. The fact that Stay Alive was nationally released (and shitfucks actually WATCHED IT) while this movie has been in limited release for 3 weeks show that William H. Macy's character was right: Americans DO need warning labels on dangerous products. Not for safety, but for their own fucking stupidity. The are gonna be those 'Big Tobacco' haters that are just going to label this movie as spin. Well DUUUUUUUUUUHHH! That's all anything ever is. At least this movie has legitimate points FOR (well not for, I will say about).
- Use Common Sense: Really, REALLY think about it. At what point would someone think that smoking is not dangerous in some way shape or form? It is fire plus smoke plus leaves. Even in the hey day of smoking, inhaling smoke was KNOWN to not be safe. Don't blame lack of knowledge for cancer now, blame excess of ignorance.
- Freedom: As long as something is legal, it should be our right as Americans to choose. People can choose to bungee jump, they can choose to worship whatever imaginary deity or faith they want but they can't light up in their favorite restaurant because of second-hand smoke? Bullshit. Your happy ass has the fucking right to LEAVE. I love how people are all for freedom until it effects them. When it all comes down to it, people should have the choice whether or not to smoke, just like people have the right to not have to sit by them.
- Shifting Blame: Let's face it here, depending on who you ask there either are or aren't links for smoking to lung cancer, emphysema and terrorism. Quite honestly, let's look at it like this. Unless you were a baby or a quadriplegic and forced to be around smokers for 20 years, you have no legit beef with the industry. Put the blame where it belongs, on yourself for smoking. Not on the cigarette industry for creating the product, you for using it. Like I said before, no one comes out of the womb with a nicotine dependency. NO ONE, fuck faulty science. A very important part of freedom is responsibility. Of all things, freedom and the right to choose are the greatest powers we have. Whether is smoking, killing babies or watching deviant pornography, we as American have the right to choose what we do, not choose who to blame. We all have backbones, use it.
Back to the point, Thank You For Smoking is an Oscar worthy flick with an AWESOME lead performance from Aaron Eckhart. In a perfect world, William H. Macy and J.K. Simmons (for those that dont know, he was J. Jonah Jameson in Spiderman and Spiderman 2) would both be up for best supporting actor nods. Yet we know that shit won't happen, but a movie like 'Brokeback Mountain' was nominated this year for no reason whatsoever. I guess it is better to be gay than a smoker. There is a joke there, but I have morals.
So before I go any futher....BoA. We need to talk though. You see, you are hitting a very important age here. You will be 20 this November and I have to warn you. This is about the time when pop princesses go pure whore. Not all, there are some women who have good heads on their shoulders (it's a reach to think of who, so I will have to get back to you on that) at this age. However, this was about the time when Britney's trailer park genes took over. And Christina....I think she's more crazy than a whore, I honestly do. However, I hope you stay the way you are. There is nothing wrong with sexuality because it is natural. Just don't end up getting knocked up by a dipshit backup dancer and go off the deep end with the alcohol. I have too much respect for you. With that being said peeps, here is Kiseki....mmmmmmm neeeeyaawwww.
You know, that is one special young lady right there. Oh, and another thing. A few of people on YouTube had the AUDACITY to call Kumi Koda a whore. First off, FUCK YOU. To call Kumi Koda slutty compared to BoA....is a valid argument. Yes, the dresses provocatively for a Japanese woman. Compared to her competition (who I would guess are like Namie Amuro, Hikaru Utada and Ayumi Hamasaki by my knowledge of Japanese music, which is still limited) who is rather racy and....yummy. But really think about it. Even in that Cutey Honey performance I had up a few weeks ago, she is STILL more dressed up than some of the trollops I have seen at the clubs in Denver and the Springs. Those who have been know what I mean. And have you seen high schoolers these days? I rest my case. With that being said, leave Kumi Koda alone. She may be a little suggestive (okay, I saw X.X.X. with Soulhead, maybe VERY suggestive) but she is more modest than most artists we have here, and she can actually sing and dance at the same time. That being said, my PV from the future Ms. Chachi, Butterfly.
DAMN. Three words: BY THE FIRE. You know, that kind of stuff never happened in the office I worked at. If it did, I might have tried harder to keep my job. Hot Asian ladies dancing with you is a very good perk for a workplace. If BoA grows up to be like Kumi Koda...dare I say it is on like championship Ping Pong. Mmmmm.
Oh, and I am trying to find out if she is still dating Se7en. He is a Korean singer that is (or was) dating BoA. I heard his name before, but I didnt know he was the enemy. Just saw the guy and....well...
O_o
Se7en....um...listen to me and listen good. I will quote Martin Luther King Jr for you. Ahem...
MICHAEL JACKSON IS NOT A GENRE OF MUSIC!!!
Not gonna lie, I like your music and have for about the last 5 months. However....if I have planned the punching in the face of Usher since 1997 for copying Jacko, what do you think I feel about this? You are copying Usher. Usher, man. The presentation is not original. Neither is anyone else's, but that's neither here nor there. You are dating my dream woman, and I want to make sure you are not an ubertool. I'm gonna help you out, Se7en. Your music is actually very good, but if your dance moves have been pilfered from any of the following asshats:
- Usher
- Ginuwine
- Justin Timberlake
- Chris Brown
- Omarion
- B2K (with or without the above)
- Houston (sorry to hear about the eye and the suicide. Get help and get better, man)
- Aaron Carter
- O-Town
- Backstreet Boys (Pre-I Want It That Way. Afterward, they weren't that bad)
- Farnsworth Bentley
- Diddy (If you take anything from him, I will find you and kick you in the nuts. Seriously)
- MC Hammer (U can't touch him, don't try to touch him)
- Britney Spears (Trust me on this one. Just don't)
- ANY video with the 'booty shake' or the 'shake your tailfeather' (This is more for BoA's sake than anything else. If I EVER see her do that dance, you both have lost a fan)
Then change them IMMEDIATELY. Please. Oh, and on another note, if you are trying to portray the 'Black' culture in the video, that is cool. But most normal Blacks don't drive Escalades and after what happened to Radio Rahiem in Do The Right Thing, we don't carry around jamboxes anymore. It's just ignorant. Aside from that, keep up the good work and treat Ms. Kwon right. You are a lucky man if it is still true. Break her heart, and you go on the list with Cashman, Eric Benet, Nick Cannon and Carson Daly of people who will feel the Wrath of Chachi, Jersey Style.
Now for the 'Ignorance Is Spreading' news of the day. The NFL Competition Committee (um...yeah what the fuck is that bullshit?) decided to put the clamp down on endzone celebrations. What is really amusing is that they tacked it on, much like they do in Congress, to other issues that are WAY MORE IMPORTANT like protecting the QB in the pocket so that what happened to Carson Palmer (against Pittsburgh, which tore all the major ligaments in his knee I honestly believe cost Cincy a Super Bowl run), Mike Vick (against Minnesota, which strained is MCL and cost him 3 full strength games and a playoff berth) and Brian Griese (which cost him his job in Tampa Bay) will be met with stiff fines. You know, on the touchdown celebration thing, its about freedom again. There shouldn't be LIMITS to freedoms (ahem, George Bush and his priceless fucking line), there should be conequences for actions. A penalty and a fine is alright by me if the NFL feels it effects 'sportsmanship.' Let's face it, if you feel it effects sportmanship, grow a set. I honestly believe that if you don't want them to dance, stop them from scoring. The NFL is intervening where they are not needed. Is it sporting to chop block? Is it sporting to horse-collar tackle? Focus on things that hurt bodies, not feelings. Another reason I am beginning to hate sports.
So I am going to head out for a spell. I'm telling you now, I have some things to say about that Natalee Holliway stupidity and the awesomeness that is Duke Lacrosse. I mean, who thought an almost all white lacrosse team (there is one black guy, but he's there for PR, I'm sure) raping a black escort (just asking for trouble with that job in that area) in a racially divided city would cause an uproar? Assholes. Either Friday or Saturday those will be up.
Tune in tomorrow, peeps. Until then.....you know what I say:
I'D HIT THAT! I'D HIT THAT! I'D HIT THAT!
Chachi Out.
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