What is up, peeps?! I am back on the scene with a few things to get off of my chest…
Issue #1: Furries Freak Me Out Officially
Now at first I never understood what my friends distain for furries was about. I mean from what I knew it was just people that liked to dress up as animals as a lifestyle choice when they had teh sex. Now I for one am not one to judge because my Japanese schoolgirl/Wonder Girls fetish is very well known if not complete public knowledge. So I for one cannot hate on anyone that wants to engage in a little role play. However, I actually was cool with furries until I found out that they don’t just dress up AS animals…they think they have ANIMAL SPIRITS and they are channeling it via dressing as them. Then fucking. Yeah…fuck no. YOU SICK FREAKS.
Now I will be the first to admit that I am not one to talk but god damn it I now believe that furries need to be rounded up and put in concentration kennels. Yeah, I so went there! As deviant as I can be (And a select few of you know that I am a creepy dude) I am not going to dress up as an animal because I believe I am a cat trapped in a human body. That is just dumb. Now if you excuse me, I am going watch me some Hinoi Team:
Two of them are legal! I will leave it up to you to figure out the two. Just so you know, in Japan that shit don’t matter and that is why that place is awesome.
Issue #2: Black Dudes With Bad Haircuts
Okay, about a month ago I was told that Bobby Valentino had a shag. First off, I am sure that is NOT his real name. If it is, that dude should be doing gay porn because that is the gayest name since Rumpert Thrusterton. Secondly, I didn’t really know much about the guy except from the “Slow Down” video from a few years ago and I said “Hey, Al B. Sure’s little brother must have made an album” because that is who he looked like. So the other day I actually saw him on TV for the first time in a few years and lo and behold…this grown ass man had a GOD DAMN SHAG IN THE BACK OF HIS GOD DAMN HEAD: Aint that bout a bitch? I for one will admit that I had a shag. All of us did, so don’t front. The operative word in that sentence is DID! The shag went out about three weeks after it came to pass and this man is rocking it today! He just went to fucking Food Lion to get groceries and he had a god damn shag! That makes no sense! Now I love me some Kanye West no matter what people think so eat a dick and stop reading of you have a problem with that. Seriously, life aint that major. Yet…this mad a Afr-ullet: How can someone leave the house looking like that?! I have had several folical faux paus but man that is just some godless shit right there! And now that I have your attention, what is it with Black men and the mohawk? I am sorry but unless you listen to punk or are Mr. T you DO NOT NEED A MOHAWK, BLACK OR WHITE:
I pity the foo that still has a mohawk and and down with moshpit! Or aint T! If you ain’t T, then you a foo! Aaaaahhh, the 80’s: when shit didn’t make sense and we were to coked up to care.
Well, that is all for now. I will try to be back up by Wednesday for something or I may put up my old rant on perfection from last year. It’s kind of long but it is one of my favorites and I have been putting up reposting it for a bit. Until next time, stay up peeps.
Well, it is a cold and snowy Friday…in FUCKING APRIL but you know I got what you came here for on a Friday (Albeit late as hell)!
Chachi’s Top 20 Video Countdown!
Let’s get started shall we?
20. BoA - Eien (Last Week #16) We start off with BoA. All I have to say is…THE FULL VIDEO IS OUT! THE FULL VIDEO IS OUT! That is all, talk amongst yourselves. 19. Young Money feat Lil Wayne – Every Girl (New Entry)
So we have a debut from one Lil Wayne and the Young Money staff. I can honestly do without the first 15 seconds of vulgarity but the rest of the song is pure gold IMHO. And holy shit, its JAE MILLS! I thought you were dead! 18. Charles Hamilton - Loser (Last Week #20) Charles Hamilton moves up two spots this week as we have more hip hop videos on the Countdown than I can remember for a while. It’s kind of…scary. 17. Jesse McCartney – It’s Over (Last Week #14) J-Mac falls three spots this week with his first ever Countdown entry. So…am I the only one going to see “17 Again” tonight? IT’S THE EFF! 16. Keri Hilson featuring Kanye West & Ne-Yo – Knocks You Down (Last Week #17) Keri, Ne-Yo and Kanye move up one spot this week. So her album doesn’t sound too bad. However, I am waiting for the Asher Roth so no go for now. 4/20, fools! 15. UVERworld – 99/100 Damashi no Tetsu (Last Week #12)
The World falls three spots and I have to say I am looking forward to some newness from them. I honestly thought Bleach would ping them for their 10th opening but I was wrong about that. More on Bleach later! 14. Wonder Girls – NOW (Last Week #18, Biggest Mover) Yeah…I love them. Just got the dance version of the video and I realized something. These girls…can’t dance. At all. But DAMN they look good when they try! 13. BACK-ON – flyaway (Last Week #10, Two Weeks at #1) BACK-ON falls from the Top 10 for the first time in over three months I believe. They have had a great run and I think this is the beginning of a new album this winter. HELLS YEAH. 12. Pitbull – I Know You Want Me [Calle Ocho] (Last Week #15) Pitbull is shocking a lot of people this week as he jumps up three spots this week. He isnt the first latin rapper to make it on here. I mean, if you count Daddy Yankee as rap I mean. 11. Namie Amuro - WILD (Last Week #13)
Namie moves up two big spots this week as she looks for her first Top 10 video since 2006. Okay, I know the dancing leaves something to be desired but did you see her in the Coke Zero commercial? FIY-YAH! 10. John Legend – Everybody Knows (Last Week #8, One Week at #1) We start the Top Ten with John Legend who falls two spots. He has been laying low since the premire of this video. I guess with T.I. in jail we wont be seeing a video for “Slideshow.” 9. Dev Parade – Bachokkoi!! (Last Week #11) BRINGING IT TO THE TOP TEN! Dev Parade moves up two spots and gives the Naruto song collection their sixth Top Ten video! Oddly enough, only FLOW’s Re:Member and nobodyknows+ got to the top. BACHOKKOI TO NUMBER ONE!! 8. T.I. featuring Justin Timberlake – Dead and Gone (Last Week #5) Guess T.I. is gonna be gone for a while now. Gonna miss the little guy. I wonder what Justin Timberlake will do without his street cred…ZING! 7. Jesse McCartney featuring Ludacris – How Do You Sleep (Last Week #9)
J-Mac and Luda are moving on up! With his second Top 10 video in two weeks, can Jesse finally take that next step and take over the Countdown? We will have to see! 6. Hikaru Utada – Come Back To Me (Last Week #7) I MISSED UTADA ON AMERICAN TV!! She was on one of the early shows and I missed it! DAMN IT I MISSED MY BABY BOO! 5. Yuna Ito – Trust You (Last Week #1, Three Weeks at #1) Oh nooooo! After three weeks of dominating the Countdown, Yuna Ito falls a big five spots to nuber five this week. That means we have a new number one! She had a great run and now is battling Yui for the biggest female artist on the Countdown. Do we have a new queen? 4. BoA featuring Sean Garrett – I Did It For Love (Last Week #6)
Not If BoA has anything to do about it. Also…FULL VIDEO, FOOL! Hell yes, she is hot and you so know it. Now if you excuse me…I have to marvel at her beauty. I will see you in the Top Three. 3. Lil Wayne – Prom Queen (Last Week #4)
We are back and Lil Wayne has moved into the Top Three! He has a new video out with Young Money but he is still hanging on with this one here. So…when is the album coming out, jerk? 2. Abingdon Boys School – STRENGTH (Last Week #3)
TM and Company are one step away! Abingdon Boys School are looking for their second number one video and their first since 2007’s “HOWLING” took the top in the spring. Can they return to the top once again? Well, to do so they will have to knock off our new number one video! 1. Shion Tsuji – Sky Chord ~Otona ni Naru Kimi he~ (Last Week #2, One Week at #1)
After three months, Shion Tsuji has taken the crown! She knocked off a veteran in Yuna Ito and held off former top spot holders Abingdon Boys School to prove she deserves to be on top. Also, the new opening by Scandal is bad ass. This also gives Bleach their fifth number one video and their first from a closing theme!
That is all for this week! Tune in next Friday to see if Shion can make it two weeks on top! Or can Abingdon Boys School rock to the top once again? Or will Lil Wayne take the top for the first time? See you in seven to find out!
Well, Happy Birthday to Zach and see 17 Again! It was pretty damn good and Zac Efron is FRICKIN HOT. I’m just saying. Be back either next week or maybe Sunday night. Peace out, ya’ll!
What is up ya’ll?! I am back for a quick update as I do laundry and get ready for another 12 hour day…with four of them in fricking transit. God, I am really beginning to hate this. However, I do have my brand new avatar for my work IM: BIG BABY JESUS, MOTHERFUCKER! I gotta have my small victories, you know. Oh, and I quoted A Pimp Named Slickback to boot. Yeah, I find ways to be happy.
So a few things I need to get off my chest…
Issue #1: Stop Doing The Electric Slide
Okay, I understand that people think that because I am Black that I am supposed to LOVE the electric slide. Well, first off I am not that good at it. Yes it is an easy dance and I know the movments but it is a dance that has passed its service. I mean seriously:
I mean I hate the Soulja Boy now with a passion (There was about three weeks when I liked it…then I sobered up) but at least its recent. This dance is 108 years old! I am not going to say it’s an old dance but Jesus did this at the last supper! I mean, it was before his feet got nailed so he was a lot better on the good foot. Yeah…I’m going to hell. Anyway, who still does the electric slide? Old Black people and old White people. Yeah, line dancing is just the electric slide sped up to accommodate even those with the most lacking of rhythm. I think that it is officially time to retire the electric slide. Instead we need to bring back dancing in prisons!
I’m sure Chris Brown will be able to do this better once he gets in. Aw, snap! Yeah, I gots Chris Brown jokes for days. Also Rihanna jokes but they are all about not being able to take a punch and the size of her forehead.
Issue #2: Chasing Is For Coyotes
So the other day I had a discussion with a friend about a situation a few weeks back where I was forced to mingle with people at happy hour. I am not really an engaging person but when I have to be I can so some semblance of a personality. It seemed that I was having an okay time taking to some friends of the person I went with and after the fact we went to have sushi and she asked me if I asked her friend for her number to which I responded no. Now after this there was a pretty interesting discussion about what pursuit when it comes to attraction really means.
From what I gathered, it pretty much means that a man is supposed to chase a woman until she decides otherwise. As a man you have to know WHEN she is ready to stop lest you get hemmed up by the party patrol and I don’t mean Loverboy. You see, I stood by my logic that attraction should be two ways and if it is then both parties should acknowledge interest, whether covert or overly. If a man opens up to a woman and shows interest and she backs away for any other reason aside of lack of interest she is wasting both peoples time. You see, no means no so if a man stops chasing because you are being coy and back away you can’t get pissed off. In this case I didn’t say anything because I run under the assumption that everyone hates me. It sounds like a bad outlook but you are always happy to meet new people when you think everyone wants to drink your blood. However if the other party is interested, just conversation isnt really a way to show that you want to go past the cordial hello. If that is the case then I am a whore because I will talk to anyone at a party, bar, convention or club because if you are going to sit on the wall and judge people or be a party-pooper then take your ass somewhere else. You don’t HAVE to be at a party so make the most of it or get the fudge out. With that being said, I have mentioned on here before that I understand the logic behind the chase. Everyone wants to be desired. However, the PROBLEM with the chase is the same problem I see with trying to get attention. If you wear something revealing you are going to get attention and not always from the people you want it from. You have to accept that. If a man drives a nice care he is looking for attention but some times he doesn’t get the attention he wants. Like somebody jacking his shit. You know where I am going, I have went there before so I am not going to go into detail. Just know what I mean and the correlation.
So is the chase really pivotal? Well…no. I think that the chase should be negated by getting to know someone. That is just me, I’m usually wrong but I think finding out that a person is borderline insane is better than seeing if he will call you back after you ignore his first call. I’m just saying…you avoid a lot of shit by doing research wather than playing grab ass. Wasting time doing that makes it your own fault when that nutty nigga is playing beat ass with your face. Yeah, I said it!
Well, that is all for now. Kind of sleepy and I have been late for everyday for like a month or so. I will try to be back Thursday. Definitly back for the Countdown on Friday. Until then, stay up.
You know you LOL'D at that blog title. If you didnt...it aint gonna get no better. So you may want to leave now. I hear the Hannah Montana movie is out; go see that shit instead.
What is up, peeps! After another rather average weekend it is time to begin another work week but until then, I need to tell people something. No one gives a fuck about Easter except Catholics and furries. Seriously, if you believe in the story of Magical Jesus’s Crucifix Emporium you are a moron (Yeah, I said it) and if you are into the whole Easter Bunny thing then you are a furry and deserve nothing less than FUCKING DEATH. Yeah, I said that too. The fact that people believe the story of Jesus and creationism (Oh, and his eventual Hulk Hogan-like comeback agains the forces of the…Sith?) but cannot accept that he was a Jew which is actually logical and tangible I have to say…your religion is bullshit as a truth. If you ubelieve that it is a kick-ass story full of intrigue and utter contridictions then that is good. But if you celebrate this day because you think the shit actually happened…no. Just no. Stop telling me the story like it makes sense, either.
This goes to all of you religions, too. None of your religions are right so it over it and get over yourselfs. There is nothing wrong with not fucking knowing so STOP MAKING SHIT UP. If you are a Christian, Catholic or whatever and you are offended then you are a fucktard because what I say shouldn’t matter because the word of the Bible is paramount and my insulting of it means nothing because my actions will make it so that I will never know the kingdom of heaven so my words should be moot to you. Besides, if heaven is full of zombies, children hepped up on candy and furries then I say you take your heaven and shove it up your ass. I BID THE GOOD DAY…MOTHERFUCKA! Got to keep it real.
So my distain for your bullshit book and asinine beliefs aside, if you believe in Special J then have fun this Easter and be sure to watch some Korean action movies! It’s what I do on Easter. You color eggs, eat candy, fast and praise the teachings and well deserved death of a mouthy Jew. I watch “The Good, The Bad, The Weird” so it all evens out:
Hells yeah. Byung-Hun Lee > Jesus H. Christ. Yeah, I said it. He is fucking hot and you so know it. I will try to be back up on Monday or Tuesday with something. Until then, stay up and Happy Zombie Jew Day! You know, if I actually had readers people may have been pissed off by this. Since I don’t, I can say what I want! The Wolven bless America!
What is up, peeps! It is another Friday which means its time for…
Chachi’s Top 20 Video Countdown!
We begin with a new entry from one of hip hops new faces!
20. Charles Hamilton - Loser (New Entry)
We start this week with a young cat in hip hop. Charles Hamilton has been in my ear for a while and this song has become one of my favorites. I am wondering what is up with some album work. 19. B.o.B. – I’ll Be In The Sky (Last Week #15, Plunge of the Week) Bobby Ray falls four big spots this week as it looks like his run on the Countdown may be coming to an end. He is in a new video with Willy Northpole which so far isn’t half bad. 18. Wonder Girls – NOW (New Entry)
DAMN YOU, JYP! Yoo Bin and the rest of the girls have officially began their plan to get me vanned because they are back. This one is a remake and it looks like my baby boo has put on some curves. ME RIKEY! 17. Keri Hilson featuring Kanye West & Ne-Yo – Knocks You Down (Last Week #19) Keri Hilson moves up two spots this week as we all saw the episode of South Park this last week and it was damn funny. I personally don’t like fish sticks. Wait, I just got it! 16. BoA - Eien (Last Week #13) Okay, where in the hell is her album?! I AM THROUGH PLAYING AROUND OVER HERE! I can’t find it anywhere and I know we are in Colorado but damn it there are some Koreans here! Like….12 or so. And they want it as much as I do! 15. Pitbull – I Know You Want Me [Calle Ocho] (Last Week #17) So um…this video is hot. That is all. Seriously that girl in the Brazil shirt and green skirt will be my baby boo because she is FIY-YINE! 14. Jesse McCartney – It’s Over (Last Week #11)
J-Mac falls three spots this week as we move along. Did anyone see Zac Efron on Interview magazine? Yeah, nothing to do with this but he was HAWT. 13. Namie Amuro - WILD (Last Week #14) Namie climbs one spot this week and looks to be slowing a bit. It has been a long time since she has been in the Top Ten, too. 12. UVERworld – 99/100 Damashi no Tetsu (Last Week #9) The World falls three spots and out of the Top 10 this week after getting five videos from their latest album on the Countdown over the last calendar year. Although none went to number one, The World is back! 11. Dev Parade – Bachokkoi!! (Last Week #16, Biggest Mover)
Dev Parade moves up a big five spots this week as they are looking to “bring it” to the Top 10! You know, I think only one Naruto ending has ever made it on the Countdown ever (Home Made Kazoku, I believe) so this is kind of big seeing as the dominance Bleach has had. 10. BACK-ON – flyaway (Last Week #7, Two Weeks at #1) We start the Top 10 with BACK-ON! They finally broke through and took the number one spot with this video but they fall this week a big three spots. They better give me something new. 9. Jesse McCartney featuring Ludacris – How Do You Sleep (Last Week #12) More J-Mac! Jesse McCartney is in the Top 10 for the second time in 2009 and I am wondering exactly if J-Tim is going to make a comeback or be the 2009 Lil’ Wayne? 8. John Legend – Everybody Knows (Last Week #5, One Week at #1) John Legend falls this week as his status of greatest artist on the Countdown has pretty much been solidified. Not if Yui has anything to say about it…BECAUSE SHE IS BACK! More on that in a bit… 7. Hikaru Utada – Come Back To Me (Last Week #8)
Miss Utada climbs up a spot this week with her video for HOPEFULLY the second big release from the East. BoA has disappeared from record stores and this song is actually playing in some places. NICE! 6. BoA featuring Sean Garrett – I Did It For Love (Last Week #10) Speaking of BoA, she moves up four big spots this week and is right outside of the Top Five once again. WHERE IS THE FULL VERSION OF THIS VIDEO! Stop pissing me off, Steve and make it happen! 5. T.I. featuring Justin Timberlake – Dead and Gone (Last Week #2) T.I. falls three spots this week to number five after two weeks at the runner up spot. Tip is challenging John Legend and Kanye West for the title of King of the Countdown and he will be gone for a while which means someone else may be able to take his place… 4. Lil Wayne – Prom Queen (Last Week #6) …Like Young Weezy? Lil Wayne moves up higher than he has ever been as he takes the number four spot this week. With the Young Money video almost a lock for the Countdown could this be the year of Wayne…again? We are down to three! 3. Abingdon Boys School - STRENGTH (Last Week #4)
A familiar face is back! TM Revolution has Abingdon Boys School just two steps away from their second number one video! I am so hoping that the album comes soon because…IT’S FRICING TM, THAT’S WHY! 2. Shion Tsuji – Sky Chord ~Otona ni Naru Kimi he~ (Last Week #3)
YUI IS BACK! Yes, I know Shion Tsuji is a step away from her first number one video ever but…YUI IS BACK! ON FULL METAL ALCHEMIST NO LESS! You know my love/hate with that show (So…the MOVIE IS THE ENDING?!) but damn it I AM SO READY! Just got the first episode, too. Shion is doing a great job, but another lady has topped the chart this week once again! 1. Yuna Ito – Trust You (Last Week #1, Three Weeks at #1)
Yuna Ito spends her third week on top! You know my love for Miss Ito so I won’t even go into it. But she has been dominating so far and looks to not let up anytime soon. Although her song with Spontania is just as awesome, this song is one of my favorites. Congrats!
That is all for this week! Can Yuna Ito make it a full month on top? Or will rookie Shion Tsuji make it the FIFTH Bleach song to make it to numbe one? Or will Abingdon Boys School usurp Aqua Timez as the premier J-Rock group of the Countdown? See you in seven to find out!
Well, odds are it is the movies tonight and then maybe some soju but probably not. I need to get some sleep because I am LACKING. Until next time, stay up peeps.
I am back once again, peeps! I have some things I need to say…and some things may shock you.
I Like My Chemical Romance
There…I came clean. Now you all know that I am one razorblade and a Starlight Ray album from getting a wig and writing pussy ass poetry while I talk about how much my parents didn’t love me. I am getting to emo, but not quite there. I like sunlight a bit too much. Today I pulled out an old MP3 mix and “Teenagers” came on:
And damn it…I like this song. As a matter of fact I like a lot of MCR. I know I shouldn’t but sometimes I need a good sulk party. And nothing goes better with a sulk party than MCR. Maybe Dashboard Confessionals but they fucking suck and always will. At least My Chemical Romance made “I’m Not Okay” which was awesomeness. Yeah, I said it.
So I just turned around an Eminem has a new video. And I say to myself…haven’t I already seen this shit? Let me break this down:
My Name Is = The Real Slim Shady = Without Me = Lose It = Whatever His New Song Is Called Now I don’t like getting into the argument about Eminem’s TALENT because…he isn’t better than anyone else when it comes to delivery and wordplay and never has been. The debate with women centers around “well, he’s hot” which is such a convincing argument that I wonder how come we don’t have more female Presidents. It’s called a non-sensical point; you do it and I can to. Now you know how it feels. I can’t knock the fact the dude has a formula and it works with people who are used to the same thing over and over again. With that being said I am tired of people constantly saying the guy is one of the greatest when he shows just as much repetition as the rest of the rappers that I ridicule. Yet people seem to ignore that because…he’s White. Yeah, I said it. I look at Eminem the same way Black people looked at Michael Vick in football. So blinded by the fact that they are a person not expected to succeed in the position they are in that they overlook their flaws: they are kind of overrated. Yes, you can compare the two because for two years Michael Vick was the most popular football player in the NFL (Look at jersey sales) and the highest paid player as well. But he was slightly above average. Same with Eminem IMHO. His record sales are high (The highest behind 2Pac and Outkast I believe) and people love him but at the end of the day he has MAYBE 5 songs that aren’t just “meh” on four or five albums. Not a good average as Jay-Z would allude to. Once again…just saying.
Corn Dogs: Delicious But So Sexuality Questioning!
We all know corn dogs are delicious. They are one of the many great things that carnies have given us. But man…they sure do make you feel gay. Not in the good way like watching Zac Efron “Hairspray.” I mean in the bad way, like watching John Travolta in “Hairspray.” You know what I mean. Mini corndogs help but its just not the same. Like American bukakke compared to the real Japanese kind. I mean they TRY but in the end there just isn’t enough batter. Eeeeewwww! Alright, I am out. I will be back up on Friday for the Countdown and will be up in Denver if anyone wants to roll up and hang out after Happy Hour. Until then you got to move….DAT ASS! Gotta bite my lip for that one! Chachi Out
Okay, so this is a blog from Feb of 2008. I am not feeling so hot so I started a blog this morning but work pissed me off (Except for DAT ASS!) so I came home and chilled. I will try to finish it up tomorrow and have it on before the Countdown. Until then...my rant on boobies.
So I have officially had enough of fake jubblies. Not like I am tonguing them down like an ice cream cone in Alabama in the summertime every day but the fact tha men love them so much is just getting creeps. Ladies...THEY ARE OBJECTS OF SCIENTIFIC ORIGIN IN YOUR FUCKING CHEST! They arent attractive in any way shape or form! They look like they hurt like hell, actually. I hope you are trying to impress yourself because they look TOLERABLE when clothes are on but when they are off, fake boobs look like tumors trying to escape by violently tearing through your chest and reform into evil boob beings bent on world domination. Damn your self-esteem (HAHAHAHAHAHA! Women piss me off with that one), think about the safety of the planet here!
What I really don’t get is the seed that is implanted (No pun intended; that was just ironic word placement. Wait, isn’t that what a pun is?) in women’s heads that it is what men want. It makes very little sense if that is why you get them because isn’t the whole point of “Grrl Power” to be happy with yourself and your body and fuck the world if they can’t adjust? As the song said, “I’M BEAUTIFUL, DAMMIT!” I tell myself that lie every day. It helps me get through being as unlovable and self-loathing as a gay Catholic Irish Jew Nazi gypsy. Back to the point, if women say that they are getting them for themselves that makes even less sense. To me anyway, I also like to huff paint so take what I say with a grain of salt.
Why doesn’t it make sense? Because tits don’t define a woman. Don’t get me wrong in a perfect society they SHOULD but at the end of the day, all boob meat does is produce milk and distract horny white college frat boys. And that is only to hide the fact the swallow more salami than a butcher’s wife. Keep that one because it is pure gold. If getting fake breasts help your self esteem then more misguided power to you. However, you know who else liked fake tits?
Hitler.
You don’t want to appease HITLER do you? Not only are women succubi, they are Nazi. I always knew the end of the world would be via a Nazi succubus. The part of this whole situation is that women insult other women with implants ALL THE DAMN TIME! Yet so many of them have gone out and put fake Zeppelins in their chest and it is getting annoying and I am thinking maybe unhealthy both physically and mentally. No matter what any doctor says, putting a foreign object in your body, let alone in your chest near a few (I guess, anatomy isn’t my thing) somewhat vital organs seems like a pretty dumb fucking idea. Again, that is just me and I ate a lot of mushrooms in the late 90’s. Is putting your life at stake worth having 34D’s for your obviously skewed and somewhat fucked up self-esteem? If you have fake tits in your body because of any of these reasons, shooting you in the face should be not only allowed but encourages and compensated:
1. You Wanted To Spite A Man (Bright move, bitch. To upset a man that left you for fake tits you went out and got your own instead of like…investing or something. You can no longer vote…although you should have never been able to. Woman’s Suffrage should be in the kitchen, not in the voting booth! Same to DARKIES. Except their Civil Rights Movement should move them RIGHT BACK TO THE FIELD! PICK THAT DAMN COTTON, NIGGER! If you don’t get irony, stop reading this blog now. Please, it saves me the time of having to hear your fool-ass-mouth about how offensive I am because you can’t take scathing and provocative social commentary) 2. You Wanted To Get A Man (Gut check time, ladies. If a man only likes women with fake or large tits and you aint got them maybe he aint for you? If a woman wanted a white man but loved everything about me am not going to invest in shoe polish! STOP BEING STUPID!) 3. Self-Esteem (Okay….enough already. My self-esteem has been damaged by how people told me I SHOULD feel about myself but at the end of the day I just said “Fuck them in their stupid heads” and kind of either tried to kill them or moved on. If your self esteem will be helped by fake breasts then you should be shot now because you are nothing but an asshat and your asshattery will no longer be tolerated) 4. They Make You Feel “Pretty” or “Even” (WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU, A FRACTION?! Listen, you are what you are and tits can’t change that. If you are a bitch, giving you fake tits aren’t going to change the fact that you are a bitch. Much like a mouthy wide receiver, fake breasts are an external fix to the overall package of beauty. Yet, if you want to be respected for your mind, the kind of male clientele you will attract with fake breasts could care less is what is on your mind. They may love your brain, but only if you cup and swallow) 5. To Be An Individual (You know what, I want to get all the women with fake breasts and all the women with tattoos on the small of their back and put them in a room. Odds are they would overlap in the 65% to 70% range. Why? BECAUSE GETTING FAKE TITS AND TATTOOS ARENT INDIVIDUALITY! IT IS THE ULTIMATE IN CONFORMITY! God, women are the new fucking emo. We need to proceed to bomb the fuck out of that room and start over civilization) 6. DADDY DIDN’T LOVE ME! (You know what? I actually heard this when I was in college. Now she didn’t SAY this, but my probing questions….which were all pretty much “WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU”….found that was the end result. You know what? My family has tried to kill me 3 times. TODAY! You don’t see me running around killing puppies and kidnapping minors. You know why? Because I found a way to DEAL WITH SHIT like feeling like my parents didn’t love me! By drinking. Everybody got their something) 7. It’s My Body! Whateva! I Do What I Want! (You are correct. It is your body. I have two words for you: Lil Kim. Nuff said 8. I Didn’t Have To Pay For Them, My Husband/Boyfriend/Pimp Did! (Okay….so if your husband paid for radial tires, would you stitch them onto your fucking thighs? Because that is what you are doing.
The simple fact is that at the end of the day, you have to be you. I am not saying people with fake breasts are conformist dogs that should be shot in the base of the skull nor am I saying they are whores. However, I am saying that there are only TWO logical reason for getting implants:
• Your boobs are uneven (That has to be JACKED. Up until the surgery and had one ball that was twice the size of the other. I’m happier now….although no one aside from me and that security guard at the mall have seen them) • You need them for work (GOD BLESS STRIPPERS! Seriously, because they are going to hell)
If you need them for work then more power to you because odds are you are doing anal and that aint how I roll. Or you are sliding down a pole and once again….that aint how I roll. No matter how many drinks you give me. Unless it’s Bi or Prince. HE IS HOLDING A PUPPY! HOW CAN YOU NOT WANT TO MARRY HIM?! As for Prince, his Bankai is his sexy. To use it would make everyone in the world orgasm at the same time causing mass hysteria and sexual Armageddon. He could impregnate the whole city of Pittsburg with is damn shikai. Wow….I think I just outnerded myself.
For the fellas. Seriously, would you rather have this: Or THIS: I dont know about you, but give me Alicia (AND HER FINE SELF), Hyori and Mandy Moore any day. Look, ladies they have average titty balls too boot! Be happy with yourselves, you're beautiful...just not always bright.
Anyway, nothing wrong with you if you want to get fake bra steaks. There just really isn’t a reason because it doesn’t make you beautiful. Being smart and hating Nick Cannon make you beautiful. Me…I’m about the jiggle jam. The pudding cups. The rump roast. The rumpatory. The backyard:
Now THAT’S Big Pimpin. Thick like a McDonald’s milkshake with Snickers in it with a half-size straw in a blizzard in Tibet. TASTES GOOOOOOOOOOOOD! Hate if you want, ladies. Who cares what is in the frontyard anyway? The back yard has the barbeque so that means it has the FIY-YAH! Mmmm....like I said, its better to beg for change than beg for dollars when it comes to the booty. Ah, objectification of women is not cool peeps. They deserved to be respected for their minds. *Tries to keep straight face*
Well, I am out. I may post my Perfection Rant on Thursday as I may need more time to finish this latest rant. It will be my first in a few months and I want it to be worth the wait. Until then, stay up and stay tuned.
Quick update because I am PISSED OFF TODAY. Let me just run down some things.
Issue #1: I Hate Bike Riders
Seriously, if you are a bike it doesn’t make you a human/car hybrid. You are either on the fucking sidewalk or in the fucking street. You can’t hop back and forth and shit, cutting off cars, running lights and nearly killing pedestrians. I understand you want to save the planet and all that shit and that is cool. Way to go and all that. However, if you get hit by a car for being a fucktard I really don’t feel bad for you. When you are on the road you are a fucking car, not a pedestrian. If you get hit like a car because you are riding around like Mirror Edge…you suck like Mirror Edge. And die violently as well.
Issue #2: Wonder Girls Are Hot
What the hell, man?! I AM NOT GETTING VANNED BECAUSE YOO BIN DECIDES TO LOOK ALL GOOD!
Too bad she can’t really rap or sing. It is kind of a conundrum. That and they really can’t dance well. I mean, they did the “So Hot” dance well but even Soulja Boy could do the Soulja Boy. HE MADE IT! *Sigh* I guess growing up is really hard to do. Especially when I am in love with that.
Issue #3: I Really Like Getting Paid
But the shit aint gonna happen though. Needless to say, I am not happy about it. I can’t say it comes as a shock but much like surprise buttsecks I knew it could happen but I didn’t really EXPECT IT.
But in the end, buttsecks is something we all don’t need but we get so you better be prepared for it. That’s why Friday I am drinking myself stupid for happy hour and anyone who is down for The Great Divide in Denver let me know. I may buy you a beer or two.
That’s all for now. May have an update on Wednesday depending on how I am feeling but until then, you all stay up.
What is up, peeps! I am back for a Monday update and I have a topic that might be a little bit different from the norm. Now very rarely do I talk about my own personal habits because…I know you fuckers don’t care which is cool. My life isn’t as exciting as it seems. There is a lot of WEIRDNESS, but not really exciting. So with that being said, I am going to say something that many of you probably didn’t know. One of my biggest pet peeves is….
BODY HAIR
Seriously. I hate it with a passion. I hate body hair on hairy people (You know the ones. The look like a yeti mated with a wampa) and I am not even really a fan of long hair on women or men in general. It is why I loves me some Yuffie: I will gladly take a seat over there if I can find me a good cosplayed Yuffie at NDK. You have heard it now, ladies. MAKE IT HAPPEN! So a lot of this post comes from the fact that my doctor asked me if I shaved my body hair when she asked about my boil. I had to tell the truth…I do. Now I don’t go and get the shaving cream and the leather strap like in The Color Purple but I do make sure that it doesn’t look like Ben Wallace is D’ing me up in the post on a rebound. You know that joke was funny.
So after it got better and I went to a surgeon and he gave me tips on how to avoid the horribleness that happened to me in the future, he told me to “trim” any areas that would be sensitive to ingrown hairs. As I left I realized something: I trim everywhere. Which…freaked me out a little but made me ask a question that I wasn’t comfortable with answering:
Is it gay to shave your body hair as a dude?
So my answer to this has always been NO but what I think is weird. It’s why I would rather have Kristen Chenoweth over Scarlett Johanssen. I likes me a woman that can sing…and is over the age of 35. It’s kind of a problem. I’m getting help with it. I stopped watching Lifetime and Oxygen for one. Anyway, I for one have to admit that I DO NOT want an untamed field on a woman and I would figure that it would only be fair that I do the same. Not only that, I feel that body hair is FUCKING GROSS and should be eliminated at all costs. Therefore….yes I do make sure the playing field between the hedges is ready for play on Saturday.
Yes, I just called my wang Sanford Stadium. In that’s stadium’s defense, it gets a lot more action than I do. I mean, at least six games a year. I don’t think I have had six women see my field in the last ten years. Although one was from Flordia and Georiga NEVER BEATS FLORIDA! SICK BURN! Sigh, I am so awesomely lame.
Well, I am out for now. I will try to be back on Tuesday or Wednesday. Until then stay up peeps. Chachi Out
What is up, peeps?! It has been a while since I have done a general post for the hell of it but those of you that know me understand why. Between the hospital visists, bullshit at the good old paycheck factory (Or lackthereof. ZING!), AnimeLand Wasabi and going through my mid-life crisis at 28 I will just say that the month of March was kind of a turning point in my path to superstardom. Either that or blinding rage-filled insanity. Either way, someone is getting punched in the balls.
So a lot happened in March that I didn’t get to talk about. Most of it was based off of either conversations or events that I never got a chance to tell the peeps about due to being sick or hella busy. I will try to recap them through April and also bring some new stuff because…I can just tell that April is going to piss me off. I haven’t had a calm April since 2005 and this one doesn’t seem to look like it will break that streak.
I have gotten some questions, a few blog related while some were just questions in general over the last few weeks. I am going to try to answer a question a day so if you have something to ask, go ahead and feel free to do so. Odds are there is no question too personal but if it is I will answer the best I can with out giving away too much about other parties. So, let me get started with one that a certain lady that asked me after a slight argument…
Why Are You So Hard On The Victim?
First off: NO I’M NOT. This all stems mostly from a post she read I believe I put up in 2007 about my stance on date rape and how in my women’s studies class in college I was said to be “blaming the victim” but in actuality I was blaming asshatery. The conversation got on domestic violence and you know my stance on that: you gotta beat em to keep em. I KID, ASSHOLES! Geez, that may be the funniest thing Griff has ever said. Get a few drinks in me and I will tell you but I too have been involved in a dysfunctional union. And I have to say that I understand the reasons that women sometimes don’t leave (comfort, fear, they are LOADED WITH THAT PHAT CASH, they throw plates at you…shit, flashback) I can understand and usually sypathize with. Like anything I say and everything I believe, that is understandable to an extent. You see, this whole conversation started when I said that Rihanna taking back Chris Brown and subsequently leaving him and acting like a dumbass was even worse than breaking it off and going into seclusion. Now I have gotten a bad rap from…well…everyone due to my views on this blog about women and men being fuckwits and I wont back down from them. But I believe there is something generally stupid about someone that leaves an abuser and going batshit crazy by fucking anything that moves in “revenge.” I have always said that when you lose, the first thing you do is go over what happened and see what went wrong to make sure you don’t repeat the mistakes. It isnt dwelling, it’s reviewing game film. If you see that you always allow a certain type of behavior and that behavior of the other party results in a boot in your ass…you don’t learn anything from that by fucking the next person that buys you a drink because you need to “vindicate” yourself.
So let’s circle back. I am not hard on victims. I have heard that in the last month by no less than three people and I have to say that I am a pretty logical human being. I have faluts and flaws but I also have a set of beliefs that I think are pretty darn good. One of those beliefs is that you don’t commit violence on people. ANYONE. Whether it be in war (And I am not a hippie, I just think that dance offs solve more than bombings)
Or in a relationship. Violence is VIOLENCE. The concept of domestic violence to me personally put the stigma of being weak on women just as I feel “hate crime” puts the same stigma on minorities. That it makes it worse when we get abused than if a White person has the same crime happen against them. The act of violence is one I may find humor in but I never condone the actions. It isnt right to hit anyone…although some motherfuckers deserve it. That being said, I don’t believe I am hard on the victim as much as I am hard on the actions. You see, I learned from someone a long time ago that you can question the actions but you can never truly question someone’s motives because unless told you don’t really know. So I don’t know really why a woman will stay with an abusive person nor do I want to. I know my own situations and I understand conceptually but I will never know that persons’ mindstate or rational. But I CAN say that if you get beaten in a public forum and you decide to stay with that person and then leave when people question your actions that you are kind of weak. Now like I said I can only judge the actions and the actions seemed erratic. I don’t know WHY she did it because maybe she wised up and realized “You know, once you know the Street Fighter II re-dizzy combo with Guile you never NOT USE IT and I don’t want that again because that is a devastating backhand he has." And that would be a good thing. OR she did it so she could dick around with Fez. Which is also fine but understand that calling things how they are isn’t being hard on the victim. She also got pissed off about my date rape theory but all I have to say is that if I buy you a drink and you drink it up then you are going home with me! Now all the fellas sing it!
Oy vey, I miss that song. So I will have something up later tonight or Monday night as another question. If you have one, feel free to ask it. Until then, stay up peeps.
What is up, ya’ll! AnimeLand Wasabi has come and gone and man…it was awesome. Thanks to Von, Andy and Shai for not making me feel like a damn lush. To celebrate, you know we have to count down the twenty biggest videos on the planet! It’s time for…
Chachi’s Top 20 Video Countdown!
Let’s get started with the longest running video in Countdown history looking like it is about to spend it’s last week with us!
20. RSP with DA BUBBLE GUM BROTHERS – LA.LA.LA LOVE SONG (Last Week #17, One Week at #1) It looks like RSP xBGB is spending their final week on the Countdown. After almost SIX MONTHS no less. Now that is what Chachi Awards are made of, peeps. 19. Keri Hilson featuring Kanye West & Ne-Yo – Knocks You Down (New Entry)
For the first time, Keri Hilson makes her way onto the Top 20! I will be the first so say I am not her biggest fan but I really like this song and the video…yeah, she is attractive. I likey, but the rest of her stuff has sucked. Yeah, I said it. 18. YA-KYIM respects SEAMO - SA IKOU! (Last Week #15, Two Weeks at #1) YA-KYIM is STILL HANGING ON! I am getting a little nervous about the fact I may have to wait a while for new stuff from them. And that makes me a sad panda. 17. Pitbull – I Know You Want Me [Calle Ocho] (New Entry)
Pitbull makes his first ever appearance on the Countdown! Pitbull has been a favorite rapper of mine for a while and…um…yeah, the ladies in this video are hot. Sue me, I likey the booty. 16. Dev Parade – Bachokkoi!! (Last Week #19) So I played the HELL OUT OF THIS SONG during AnimeLand Wasabi last weekend. That was a hell of a lot of fun, too. Check out the slideshow, fools! 15. B.o.B. – I’ll Be In The Sky (Last Week #12) So B.o.B. seems to have fallen off the face of the Earth over the last month or so except for being at SXSW. I need something new, fool! 14. Namie Amuro - WILD (Last Week #18)
Namie moves up a big four spots this week as I await a new album from her…in 2014. Trust me, it will take that long. 13. BoA - Eien (Last Week #10) BoA falls three spots this week from the Top 10 as I wonder…where do I find this song on an album? Can someone help me out on this one? I thought it was on the Best of USA edition but it isnt. 12. Jesse McCartney featuring Ludacris – How Do You Sleep (Last Week #14) J-Mac moves up two spots as he goes back to back this week. Could it be that J-Mac…is having a bigger year than J-Tim? SAY IT AINT SO! 11. Jesse McCartney – It’s Over (Last Week #8) We have more Jesse at number 11 this week. Although he has fallen from the Top 10, he has been doinig pretty well for the year so far. 10. BoA featuring Sean Garrett – I Did It For Love (Last Week #13)
We are in the Top 10 and we have BoA with her third video in the upper half this year. Okay, first off someone needs to find this album in a store for me. Secondly, they need to get me some stills of this bad boy because I needs me some hot BoA as my desktop. 9. UVERworld – 99/100 Damashi no Tetsu (Last Week #6) The World falls three spots this week as this is song number two I wore out at the con. I am interested to see if the guys lay low or go right back into another single after giving us a kickass album in January. 8. Hikaru Utada – Come Back To Me (Last Week #11) Miss Utada is moving up! She bounces up three spots into the Top Ten for the first time. Here is hoping that her English album does better this time than Exodus. I liked it but…no one else did. BECAUSE YOU ALL SUCK! And it was off the wall, but still. 7. BACK-ON – flyaway (Last Week #4, Two Weeks at #1) After a dominating run, BACK-ON falls three spots this week and out of the Top Five. Yet another song I played the hell out of during the con last weekend. From what I remember of it, anyway. Shit, that was good times! 6. Lil Wayne – Prom Queen (Last Week #9)
Young Weezy is moving up this week! He jumps three spots outside of the Top Five, which is the highest he has ever been solo. I have to say…I am looking forward to this album. I like what I have heard so far. 5. John Legend – Everybody Knows (Last Week #3, One Week at #1) After getting his fifth number two weeks ago, John Legend falls two spots this week. Can I just say that I kind of like Evolver? Sometimes you gotta step from behind that piano! 4. Abingdon Boys School - STRENGTH (Last Week #7) TM and Company are rocking on up! ANOTHER SONG I rocked on over the weekend and even put in the slideshow. Can they return to the top? We will see because we are down to three! 3. Shion Tsuji – Sky Chord ~Otona ni Naru Kimi he~ (Last Week #5) Wow, young Shion moves into the Top Three! This is the year for the young guns as Shion, Joe Inoue and J-Mac have all had big runs on the Countdown. None of them took number one though. 2. T.I. featuring Justin Timberlake – Dead and Gone (Last Week #2) LOL, late April Fools joke! For the second straight week, T.I. and Justin hold on to the runner up spot. So I believe Tip went to jail this week and…he is way to small to not be concerned. I’m just saying. But with The Kings spending another week as runner-ups, we have a familiar champ! 1. Yuna Ito – Trust You (Last Week #1, Two Weeks at #1)
Miss Ito holds on to the number one spot for another week! You all know how I feel about Yuna so I aint even going to go into it. Just know she is my baby boo and I NEED ANOTHER ALBUM RIGHT NOW! Congrats anyway!
Well, that is all for now. Happy Birthday to Kasey and Copper (And a late one to Gary. Totally spaced on that one, guy) and I will try to hit both parties tonight. I smell sitcom sequence! Until next time, peeps.
Damn, ya'll. AnimeLand Wasabi is over and I must say...it was quite alright. Only had about 5 hours of sleep total, many a free drink and got busted in the lip (Although it was by accident). But it WAS SO FUCKING WORTH IT. Full recap in a bit or tomorrow. I have a slideshow to make. Until then, stay tuned.
UPDATE
Bask in the awesomeness, peeps! The slideshow is up and ready for action!
Okay, a few people I want to give a shoutout to:
1. The Straw Hat Pirates: You all got another shout out! We didnt break our NDK numbers for recruits but it was fun trying! 2. The Captain and the Soccer Guy: You dudes rocked the box! And you got me a shot and a beer which was tits. 3. Andy: Man...that video of the capoiera in the Rave is so going up on YouTube. And the MAGNUM POSE as well! 4. Everyone at karaoke on Saturday: Yes, I finally sang the song. You know the song so I wont go into it...but it was epic. ONE TIME ONLY, MOFOS! 5. Anyone that got me alcohol: And damn it, there were a lot of you! Thank you for the beverages, children! Big ups to the guy that invited us to the party in his room. That drink was very bad ass! 6. The person that elbowed me at the rave: My lip hurts. But its all good cuz you started a congo line for me. I'm easy to please. 7. Everyone that asked Chef a question: One guy asked me if it got annoying and I had to tell him no. I mean, if you dress up as Kool-Aid, they will yell "HEY KOOL-AID!" So if you dress as Chef you are going to hear "Hello Chef!" every five seconds and you better be ready for it! And I tried to address everyone that said it but if I didnt: HELLO CHILDREN! LOL, gotta appreciate your audience.
Well, I need to get me some sleep. Doctors tomorrow and back to work....yay. My ass. Yeah, I fricking said it. I will return after I finally get some sleep.
Okay, there is a blizzard outside but it is HOT RIGHT HERE! So let’s get started because it is time for the…
Chachi’s Top 20 Video Countdown!
Let’s start with a long running video looking at its last week!
20. Joe Inoue – Closer (Last Week #17) We begin this week with what looks like the last week of Joe Inoue! I am wondering exactly where exactly he goes from here because I needs me a new video. 19. Dev Parade – Bachikoi!! (New Entry)
HELLS YEAH! I have been waiting for this video for a long ass time! Dev Parade is a group I really didn’t pay attention to…UNTIL THEY BROUGHT IT! This song kicks ass, the video has FUCKING PARA PARA and it made Naruto tolerable. For a while, anyway. BRING IT! 18. Namie Amuro - WILD (Last Week #20) Miss Namie moves up a subtle two spots this week. You know, she is always around in some way shape or form recently. There was like…a year where I thought she fell off the face of the earth. 17. RSP with DA BUBBLE GUM BROTHERS – LA.LA.LA LOVE SONG (Last Week #15, One Week at #1) RSP x BGB are STILL HANGING ON! My god, these guys really don’t want to give up. They have been on since NOVEMBER, man! But it IS Tha Bubblegum Brothers so…yeah, it’s worth it. 16. NERD – Sooner or Later (Last Week #13) NERD falls three spots this week as we wonder when it will all come falling down. Or when Mystikal gets out of prison. SHAKE YA ASS! I like that song. 15. YA-KYIM respects SEAMO - SA IKOU! (Last Week #12, Two Weeks at #1) YA-KYIM falls this week as well as their first quarter dominance has come to an end. It is an interesting question of when am I going to get more from them because a year like this doesn’t come along very often. 14. Jesse McCartney featuring Ludacris – How Do You Sleep (Last Week #16)
J-Mac and Luda move up this week as Jesse continues his bid to fill the void of Justin Timberlake and Rain. Big shoes to fill, homie. But keep on trying. 13. BoA featuring Sean Garrett – I Did It For Love (Last Week #18, Biggest Mover) Yeah, you know it. I STILL HAVENT FOUND A FULL VERSION OF THIS VIDEO YET AND IT IS PISSING ME OFF! I needs me my BoA! And I can’t find the album either! Pissing me off! 12. B.o.B. – I’ll Be In The Sky (Last Week #10) Well, it looks like B.o.B. has officially changed his name to Bobby Ray. Well…welcome to country music because with a name like that…it’s where you are heading. 11. Hikaru Utada – Come Back To Me (Last Week #14) So Hikaru Utada…with all her awesomeness and blatant hawtness…has never been in the Top 10. Looks like that is about to change because she moves up three big spots this week. My baby boo! 10. BoA - Eien (Last Week #7) We begin the upper echelon with BoA falling three spots. You know, in this short year she has had three videos on the Countdown and a pretty good album. I will give a full review at some point because I have some things I am upset about with it. 9. Lil Wayne – Prom Queen (Last Week #11)
Young Weezy is in the Top 10 on his own! He made it up here with Game last year but he brings his rock effort this week. I am kind of looking forward to it now but…is he on EVERY-DAMN-SONG OUT THERE? The answer is yes. 8. Jesse McCartney – It’s Over (Last Week #6) J-Mac falls two spots this week and looks to be having a pretty good 2009. He came within a hair of taking the top spot a few weeks ago and has a new video moving up. That’ll do, J-Mac. 7. Abingdon Boys School - STRENGTH (Last Week #9) ABS moves up this week as they look to recapture the the glory of “HOWLING” in 2006. Can TM bring ABS back to the top of the Countdown? 6. UVERworld – 99/100 Damashi no Tetsu (Last Week #4)
UVERworld falls two big spots this week after once again falling short of taking the top spot. One has to wonder now when this streak will ever end. Been a while since they ran the ship. 5. Shion Tsuji – Sky Chord ~Otona ni Naru Kimi he~ (Last Week #8) We are into the Top Five and we have a newcomer! Shion Tsuji moves up three big spots and continues the trend of Bleach themes near the top. I am beginning to put this song up there with some of my favorite Bleach endings (Including “Thank You” by Home Made Kazoku) which is quite a feat. Can she keep up the success? 4. BACK-ON – flyaway (Last Week #2, Two Weeks at #1) After two weeks on top and looking like they may move back, BACK-ON falls back two spots this week. I am really looking forward to their next single because I really dug their last album. I hope its like “Flower.” We are down to three! 3. John Legend – Everybody Knows (Last Week #1, One Week at #1)
In a shocker, John Legend falls after only one week on top! This makes the second straight time he hasn’t been able to hold on to the number one spot. Is he losing his edge? Nah, don’t believe the hype. 2. T.I. featuring Justin Timberlake – Dead and Gone (Last Week #3)
T.I. and J-Tim are back in the runner up spot! Two years ago they hit number two for two weeks but were unable to take the top spot. Can they do it this time around? We will have to see because this week we have a new number one video! 1. Yuna Ito – Trust You (Last Week #5, One Week at #1)
Yuna Ito is back on top! After almost TWO YEARS, Yuna Ito recaptures her throne. She hops up a huge four spots this week to take over from BACK-ON. I LOVE THIS VIDEO AND I LOVE YUNA ITO. That is all you need to know.
That is all for this Friday! Tune in next week to see of Yuna Ito can make it two straight weeks on top! Or will T.I. and Justin be the new dynamic duo on top? Or will John Legend rebound to get his swagger back? See you in seven to find out!
Well, I will be heading up to Animeland Wasabi in a bit despite the shitty weather. I will have pics up and a slideshow on Sunday. Anyone down to ride can BRING IT! Stay up, ya'll. I will have updates over the weekend.
We begin with the return of a star after almost two years of waiting!
20. Namie Amuro - WILD (New Entry)
We begin this week with the return of Namie Amuro! It has been a while since she has been on here (She had a short stint with “Funky Town” in 2006) and it is good to see her back with a little bit of dancing. Although I still think she is a tad bit robotic, I can’t deny the song is catchy as hell. 19. YA-KYIM respects KOME KOME CLUB – Kimi Ga Iru Dake De (Last Week #16, Four Weeks at #1)It looks like my baby boos are about to fall off! They have been on here for a LOOOOONG time and it will be a shame to see them go. Still love this video. 18. BoA featuring Sean Garrett – I Did It For Love (New Entry)
HELLS YES! Now I feel bad because I have yet to see the full version of this video. But let’s face it…a minute and a half of BoA is better than anything else I will see all year so I am fine with it. She brings along Sean Garrett who I don’t have anything against but it is all about BoA right now. AND BUY THE ALBUM! If you can find it, I mean… 17. Joe Inoue – Closer (Last Week #15) You know, Joe Inoue has been on the Countdown just as long as YA-KYIM has? I know, I am shocked too! But he is still hanging on, moving down two spots this week. 16. Jesse McCartney featuring Ludacris – How Do You Sleep (Last Week #19) J-Mac and Luda move up three big spots this week. Its hard to believe that this is Ludacris’s first time ever on the Countdown. I thought I liked him more. 15. RSP with DA BUBBLE GUM BROTHERS – LA.LA.LA LOVE SONG (Last Week #13, One Week at #1) RSP x BGB is still hanging on! They fall two spots this week and as of right now are the longest running artists on the Countdown ever! They just passed Yuna Ito’s “I’m Here” and I have to say that is a big accomplishment. 14. Hikaru Utada – Come Back To Me Last Week #17) Miss Utada is moving on up this week! She moves up three spots this week as I find out her English album isnt due out until fricking MAY. Aint that bout a bitch? 13. NERD – Sooner or Later (Last Week #11) Pharrell and Co. move down two spots this week. We don’t see enough of these guys lately. After being everywhere for about two years I mean. 12. YA-KYIM respects SEAMO - SA IKOU! (Last Week #9, Two Weeks at #1) YA-KYIM’s second video finally falls from the Top 10 this week as we move on. It has already been a huge year for these ladies…and it’s only MARCH. I am hoping they get more stuff out to me soon or I will go thorugh withdeawl. 11. Lil Wayne – Prom Queen (Last Week #14)
Weezy moves up three spots this week as he has once again pushed back his rock album. I believe it has been pushed out to June but I could be wrong about that. This song is really growing on me and although I am not home enough to see the video I like what I have seen so far. 10. B.o.B. – I’ll Be In The Sky (Last Week #6) B.o.B. falls four huge spots this week as we begin the Top Ten! I think 2009 is going to be a big year for this guy as long as we don’t have more 50 Cent dumbfuckery. Which…we will. 9. Abingdon Boys School - STRENGTH (Last Week #12) ABS is back in the Top Ten! TM leads his crew up three spots this wee and I am PRAYING that this gives us a new album by November. ABS vs. UVERworld for Album of the Year? SIGN ME UP! 8. Shion Tsuji – Sky Chord ~Otona ni Naru Kimi he~ (Last Week #10)
NO! More filler for Bleach after the Pendulum Arc? GOD DAMN IT ALL TO HELL! 7. BoA - Eien (Last Week #7) BoA stalls a spot this week at number seven with the debut of her latest video and of course her BAD ASS ALBUM! Full review on Sunday. 6. Jesse McCartney – It’s Over (Last Week #4)
J-Mac falls two spots this week as he fell just short from the top spot two weeks ago. He has a new video and a re-release of his last album in stores now. Pick it up! 5. Yuna Ito – Trust You (Last Week #8) Miss Ito is back! She moves into the Top Five for the first time in over a year with her latest video. I do have to say…I loves me some Yuna Ito. If you don’t know then you don’t know me and I am hurt. 4. UVERworld – 99/100 Damashi no Tetsu (Last Week #3) The World falls back one spot this week as we inch closer to the top. It has been a huge year album wise for UVERworld as they have released their best album since Timeless after two lackluster efforts. The rock is back! We are down to three… 3. T.I. featuring Justin Timberlake – Dead and Gone (Last Week #5)
T.I. and J-Tim are back together in the Top Three! They move up two big spots this week at T.I. looks for his FIFTH number one video! Can he make it happen? His job just got easier because we have a new champ! 2. BACK-ON – flyaway (Last Week #1, Two Weeks at #1)
BACK-ON falls from the top spot after two weeks of holding it down! It has been a great run as they achieved their first number one video but all good things must end sometime. Great job guys but we have a new reigning king! 1. John Legend – Everybody Knows (Last Week #2, One Week at #1)
A LEGENDARY KING! John Legend is back on top! This is his second number one video from his album Evolver and I have to say that it may not be as good as Once Again but it has its moments. This video being one of them. This also gives him his fifth number one video to boot! Hells yeah!
Well, that is all for this Friday! Tune in next week to see if John Legend can make it two weeks on top! Or if BACK-ON can get back on their throne and make it three weeks? Or will T.I. and J-Tim finally take the championship as a duo? See you in seven to find out!
Well, I think I have dinner tonight with Zach (Who is leaving for Japan for a year this week. Big ups, homie!) and then maybe Sodo’s depending on how I am feeling. Until next time, stay up peeps.
What is up, peeps? I am back for a quick Tuesday update (Don’t ask why. I’m random like that) and for the last three years I have always had a post about new vernacular I was going to bring to the forefront every year. Now some got jacked (Like Downey. I want to slap the motherfucker that said that at Mint last year) while some just never really caught on (F2T did, but not in the circles I wanted. I DON’T want to take a seat over there) but I think it is about time to bring it back for the 2009! Yeah, at some point I am going to do a post on the new Linguistics of 2009! That will be up sometime this week depending on what the doctors say on Wednesday. God, I don’t want to get cut up. SHITFUCKCUNTASSBITCHWHORERICKROSSCOCKTITTAMPON!
Sorry, had to get that out. I fear surgery, no matter how minor and shit. Oh, and no more using the word “swag.” Seriously, just say “swagger” or shut the fuck up. Asshats.
AND BUY BOA’S ALBUM TOMORROW! I am just going to buy it on iTunes and get it over with. Odds are finding it around Denver is going to be a bitch and a half. Once I get it I will review it for the peeps. Until then, ya'll stay up. (Update: HOLY FUCKBALLS, BLOGGER DOES SPELL CHECK?! News to me!)
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