Acting Region
(1) Tom Cruise over (12) New York (Tiffany Pollard)
Tom Cruise dominated the upstart New York in his Suckass Sixteen return. She got very far in her first year in the tournament but she couldn’t stop the Douchernaught that is Tom Cruise. So, who will Tom face in the Acting Regional Final?
(2) Kim Kardashian over (3) T-Pain
Two newcomers facing off in the Suckass Sixteen and Kim proved her sucking abilities by beating off two black men en route to the Regional Finals! Yes…that was a low blow. But she blows low. I KID, I KID! I actually have nothing against her but you all do or something. Let’s move on to the opposing bracket!
Asshat Region
(1) Britney Spears over (4) Tara Reid
So Tara Reid loses once again in the Suckass Sixteen! Britney is looking to make her first Douchebrawl final after a 2007 that would have actually made her a shoo in. However, she has to beat a veteran of the Douchebrawl world…
(3) Kevin Federline over (2) 50 Cent
And 50 Cent is once again denied greatness! For the second straight year he will NOT make the finals as he is defeated the man who is the only one to go to the finals two straight years! K-Fed had a slow 2007 but STILL defeated Fiddy in route to a faceoff with his ex-wife! It’s ON NOW! Now to the other end of the brackets!
Trollop Region
(1) Lindsay Lohan over (4) Akon
Lindsay continues her quest to be the first back-to-back Douchebrawl winner as she runs roughshod through newcomer Akon! As much as I DON’T like the guy he did put up a fight against the defending champ but in the end, Linsday sucked a little bit too much. So who will she face off against?
(3) Amy Winehouse over (2) George Clooney
The douchery of The Clooney is outdone by the outright asshatery of Amy Winehouse! I don’t care if she has Grammy’s. So does Fergie so they officially mean jack shit. The Clooney loses once again in Douchebrawl and once again to a newcomer. The Trollop region will have one hell of a Regional Final! So who will this winner face?
Musician Region
(1) Bono over (5) Heather Graham
So once again, Bono is one step away! He soundly defeated Heather Graham who was making her return from her Cinderella performance two years ago but she was no match for the uncrowned “Douche of the Universe.” Bono once again has a shot for the finals, but who will he face?
(2) Paris Hilton over (11) Bobby Petrino
Not really a shocker but Paris is back! She has defeated another first-timer in the Suckass Sixteen in Bobby Petrino. He put up a good fight but didn’t even get a vote after the first day so people are against Paris more than Bobby.
With all that said, the Regional Finals are set and the polls are up and ready! Let’s take a look at the final eight participants in Douchebrawl 2008!!
Action Regional Final
(1) Tom Cruise vs. (2) Kim Kardashian
Asshat Regional Final
(1) Britney Spears vs. (3) Kevin Federline
Trollop Region
(1) Lindsay Lohan vs. (3) Amy Winehouse
Musician Region
(1) Bono vs. (2) Paris Hilton
Go out and get to voting! The 500th Post Spectacular will be up this week at some point so stay tuned! Until then, VOTE OR DIE!!
Live, Laugh, Learn & Love.
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