So, my former baby boo Kumi Koda (Fellas, watch her video for "Juicy" and tell me you never look at peaches and bottles the same way again) had this to say about the wombs of women over the age of 35. Well, seeing as how I have had to deal with this conversation twice in the past 12 months (Yeah…my life really went downhill after college) all I can say is that….dammit it’s science! Just like at some point the troops stop marching, the land is no longer fertile. It’s just life. Now at 35 that may be a bit young. At least I hope so because that has been my clientele as of late and I at least want ONE kid that I can mentally destroy by the time they hit high school.
People need to get off of this “women should age gracefully” bullshit. All women aren’t Tina Turner and you know what? Her womb is barren just like any other 87 year old woman. All that shaking and all them beatings put a halt to the baby making. The womb becomes barren just like the seed no longer falls. Deal with it.
With that being said, can I just say that when I wave and say hello….there is no need to mean mug me. I am dead serious. This has become an epidemic AGAIN, as it was an issue in college but that was because my best friend was a white girl (That um…I kind of dated and that worked out shittingly) and black women pretty much felt like I betrayed them and the memory of Martin Luther King Jr. Who also reportedly banged white chicks so in essence I am more like the great civil rights leader than most other black men sans the actual getting some part. Anyway, I am naturally a cordial (HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! SHIT THAT’S FUNNY!) person so I will make eye contact and say hello to anyone, male or female. With dudes I have little problems aside from the niggas that have to bang on e’ry thang like a Bloods and Crips album and to them I say get a real life and a real fucking job. Gang banging isn’t tax deductable and has no fucking 401K so get with the real world or eat a dick. When it comes to women…they seem to look at me like I called them a cockslot and told them to “STAND AND DELIVER” and by “stand” I mean “kneel” and by “deliver” I mean “suck my wang.” I mean is all that needed? I don’t ogle, I don’t make rude comments and I never do the LL Cool J lip lick which just screams that he is gay. That’s cool if that is your thing, but LL Cool J is hard as hell….for the cock. He loves it.
Griff (or as I call him Baxter because he is like a miniature Buddha despite being Muslim) says I am looking too much into it but this has been going on for about three months now (during Christmas time when I spent a lot of time in Denver on the weekends especially) and I am really beginning to worry whether I just give off the vibe of “FUCK YOU, NIGGA!” I mean seriously, am I THAT unlikeable? I mean my family doesn’t like me but that is justified. They don’t even know me. Griff also said to chalk it up to a bad day but what are the odds that every woman that I see and say hello to is having a bad day? I mean come on! Also, one last thing as a female friend of mine actually said that it could be seen as sexual to make eye contact and say hello. First off, who in the hell do you think you are?! Let something be known right now. Get over yourself because….
NOT EVERY MAN IS TRYING TO FUCK YOU IF THEY LOOK AT YOU.
I mean I know I’m no Matthew McTimberlakefron but I am really not interested in fucking YOU as much as I am not interested in fucking a dude I say “what’s up” to in passing. Again, I am not sure that is the case but if it is, piss off. It’s women like you that encourage chauvinism because if you expect men to think of you only as sex objects, it is what you will get perceived or true. Self-fulfilling prophecy, ladies.
I am out for now. It is totally bedtime. Just had to get that off my chest before I laid out for the night.
Diddy Out
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